Dave Barry Quotes

The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion or ethnic background, is that we all believe we are above-average drivers.

Dave Barry

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Quotes to Explore

• Experience, already reduced to a group of impressions, is ringed round for each one of us by that thick wall of personality through which no real voice has ever pierced on its way to us, or from us to that which we can only conjecture to be without.

  

  Walter Pater
  • Real
  • Experience
  • Personality

• If you saw a dog going to be crushed under a car, wouldn't you help him?

  

  Oskar Schindler
  • Help
  • Car
  • Dog

• Nearly every president in the past 100 years has declared national monuments, from Teddy Roosevelt creating the Grand Canyon National Monument to George W. Bush preserving 10 islands and 140,000 square miles of ocean waters in the Northwestern Hawaiian Islands.

  

  Frances Beinecke
  • Past
  • Ocean
  • Creating

• There are over a million people running around the United States that were born to parents just on Match.com alone, to say nothing of the other properties we run, so that's a million lives that our company just had a little to do with in bringing their parents together.

  

  Sam Yagan
  • People
  • Together
  • Parents

• I skate to where the puck is going to be, not where it has been.

  

  Wayne Gretzky
  • Going
  • Been
  • Where

• 'The New World Haggadah' is meant for American Jews in the 21st century.

  

  Ilan Stavans
  • World
  • American
  • Jews

• If you be faithful, you will have that honor that comes from God: his Spirit will say in your hearts, Well done, good and faithful servants.

  

  Adam Clarke
  • Good
  • God
  • Done

• I thought I'd be doing weird, Off Broadway theater after I graduated.

  

  Laura Harrier
  • Thought
  • Weird
  • Doing

• Before 'Gremlins,' I was a normal person, then within two weeks of the movie coming out, I couldn't walk into a store without people turning around and staring. It's exciting and also scary because everyone starts telling you how amazing you are.

  

  Zach Galligan
  • People
  • Movie
  • Amazing

• 'A living dog is better than a dead lion.' Judge Douglas, if not a dead lion for this work, is at least a caged and toothless one. How can he oppose the advances of slavery? He don't care anything about it.

  

  Abraham Lincoln
  • Work
  • Dog
  • Judge

• (On seeing a former lover for the first time in years) I thought I told you to wait in the car.

  

  Tallulah Bankhead
  • Time
  • Car
  • Thought

• I can be not showered and dressed like a slob, but my lip gloss will be on!

  

  Dagmara Dominczyk
  • Will
  • I Can
  • Dressed

• Confidence is the most beautiful thing you can possess.

  

  Sabrina Carpenter
  • Beautiful
  • You
  • Confidence

• My brother Martin is two years younger than me. There has never been any competition between us - clearly he was the good-looking one; he was also very sporty, and I am not a football player.

  

  Gary Kemp Spandau Ballet
  • Football
  • Player
  • Brother

• The return we reap from generous actions is not always evident.

  

  Francesco Guicciardini
  • Always
  • Actions
  • Brainy

• I understand how the economy actually works.

  

  Carly Fiorina
  • Understand
  • Economy
  • How

• There seems little doubt in my mind that depression, in particular at the severe end of the experience of this condition, is as real a disorder as diabetes is at the severe end of blood glucose levels.

  

  Vikram Patel
  • Mind
  • Real
  • Experience

• Ladies and gentlemen, communism didn't fall. It was pushed.

  

  Jack Kemp
  • Fall
  • Communism
  • Pushed

• People like to hear songs that they can dance to. Even if they're sitting, they like being made to want to dance and move. By me being a dancer, I know how I'd dance at certain tempos. I was always good at it.

  

  Illinois Jacquet
  • People
  • Good
  • Dance

• I really like working. I can't think of a job I didn't like. I was in an Alvin and the Chipmunks movie, which is not my idea of folk art; but I really enjoyed making it, and everyone was really nice.

  

  Jenny Slate
  • Art
  • Job
  • Movie

• Read as much as you possibly can. Nothing will help you as much as reading and you'll go through a phase where you will imitate your favorite writers and that's fine because that's a learning experience too.

  

  Joanne Rowling
  • Experience
  • Help
  • Reading

• Well, my son really loves wildlife. And everytime he draws a polar bear I want to tell him there probably won't any by the time... he's my age. That's kinda hard to deal with.

  

  Thom Yorke Radiohead
  • Time
  • Age
  • Son

• Getting a compliment, even if you need a cooty shot afterwards, is still a compliment.

  

  Jen Sincero

• The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion or ethnic background, is that we all believe we are above-average drivers.

  

  Dave Barry
  • Believe
  • Age