Bill Engvall Quotes
Standup is a form of therapy. It is OK to tell problems to your audience as long as you are being honest and not boring them. I tell them that I am saving $75 an hour when I talk to them instead of a therapist.
Quotes to Explore
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You know, on the road, I never miss a meal. I eat five, six, seven times a day, depending on when I wake up and when I got to sleep. I never miss a training day. I always get my four days out of my seven.
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I tell people in Chicago to take care of themselves.
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Most people get excited about games, but I've got to be excited about practice, because that's my classroom.
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Any woman who wishes to smash into the world of men isn't very feminine.
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I'm married. I've been with my husband for six years. Now that I know what a healthy relationship is, I find I can write better about the unhealthiness of relationships.
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There is no chance and anarchy in the universe. All is system and gradation. Every god is there sitting in his sphere.
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I think writers have to be proactive: they've got to use new technology and social media. Yes, it's hard to get noticed by traditional publishers, but there's a great deal of opportunity out there if you've got the right story.
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I am a crazy Maverick fan. I would go there if Dallas was a great entertainment center.
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When I find the right information, the Web is a blessing; when I don't, it's a distraction.
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I don't believe we have defined health care reform very well in this country.
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Communities don't think, don't believe, don't want, don't have needs, don't have interests and don't make decisions. Only individuals have minds that generate desires and needs - and only individuals can make choices and decisions.
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Politicians are so detested. And the main cause is not policy; it's the fact that there is no trust.
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Starting at 11, I was a movie-theater popcorn girl, a babysitter, a sales clerk - in the Midwest, they start them early!
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My husband and I are just really laid back people.
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All happiness or unhappiness solely depends upon the quality of the object to which we are attached by love.
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After university, I was working as a stylist in the Paris theatres when I had a flash of inspiration. I made necklaces from the bikinis designed for the cabaret performers of Folies Bergeres. I was so happy with them that it was only then that I sought out formal training in jewelry.
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I said I didn't want to spend most of my life in Holidays Inns, but I've checked and they've all been redecorated. They're marvelous places to stay and I've thought it over and that's where I'd like to be.
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I love my life and my mistakes and my triumphs - all of it.
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When writing about historical characters I try to be as accurate as possible, and in particular not to misrepresent the view they held. With a real historical figure you have to be fair, and this is not an obligation you have in dealing with your own creations, so it is quite different.
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Sex hasn't been the same since women started enjoying it.
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It's not easy to part with the trophies. However, I do need to have some long-term financial security for those close to me.
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Combine the extremes, and you will have the true center.
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You seem to be attracted to trouble," he said. "Yeah, she's real pretty," I replied. "Your tongue is sharper than mine ever was." I stuck out my tongue and tried to look at the tip of it.
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Standup is a form of therapy. It is OK to tell problems to your audience as long as you are being honest and not boring them. I tell them that I am saving $75 an hour when I talk to them instead of a therapist.
