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Fame is a vapor; popularity an accident; the only earthly certainty is oblivion.
Mark Twain
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All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence, and then success is sure.
Mark Twain
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All creatures kill-there seems to be no exception; but of the whole list, man is the only one that kills for fun; he is the only one that kills in malice, the only one that kills for revenge.
Mark Twain
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You can't depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus.
Mark Twain
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The educated Southerner has no use for an 'r', except at the beginning of a word.
Mark Twain
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Lord save us all from old age and broken health and a hope tree that has lost the faculty of putting out blossoms.
Mark Twain
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A gifted person ought to learn English (barring spelling and pronouncing) in thirty hours, French in thirty days, and German in thirty years.
Mark Twain
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You don't know about me without you have read a book by the name of The Adventures of Tom Sawyer; but that ain't no matter. That book was made by Mr. Mark Twain, and he told the truth, mainly. There was things which he stretched, but mainly he told the truth.
Mark Twain
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An injurious lie is an uncommendable thing; and so, also, and in the same degree, is an injurious truth-a fact that is recognized by the law of libel.
Mark Twain
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An unpopular opinion concerning politics or religion lies concealed in the breast of every man; in many cases not only one sample, but several. The more intelligent the man, the larger the freightage of this kind of opinions he carries, and keeps to himself.
Mark Twain
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But the truth is, that when a Library expels a book of mine and leaves an unexpurgated Bible lying around where unprotected youth and age can get hold of it, the deep unconscious irony of it delights me and doesn't anger me.
Mark Twain
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France has usually been governed by prostitutes.
Mark Twain
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There is no distinctly American criminal class - except Congress.
Mark Twain
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The wit knows that his place is at the tail of a procession.
Mark Twain
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Loyalty to the Nation all the time, loyalty to the Government when it deserves it.
Mark Twain
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It may be called the Master Passion-the hunger for Self-Approval.
Mark Twain
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It is just like man's vanity and impertinence to call an animal dumb because it is dumb to his dull perceptions.
Mark Twain
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We believe that out of the public school grows the greatness of a nation.
Mark Twain
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Truth is mighty and will prevail. There is nothing wrong with this, except that it ain't so.
Mark Twain
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It is a pity we can't escape from life when we are young.
Mark Twain
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In grandchildren I am the richest man that lives to-day: for I select my grandchildren, whereas all other grandfathers have to take them as they come, good, bad, and indifferent.
Mark Twain
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Laws are sand, customs are rock. Laws can be evaded and punishment escaped, but an openly transgressed custom brings sure punishment.
Mark Twain
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'In God We Trust.' It is the choicest compliment that has ever been paid us, and the most gratifying to our feelings. It is simple, direct, gracefully phrased: it always sounds well - In God We Trust. I don't believe it would sound any better if it were true. And in a measure it is true - half the nation trusts in Him. That half has decided it.
Mark Twain
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There is no sadder sight than a young pessimist.
Mark Twain
