Mark Twain Quotes
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A crowded police docket is the surest of all signs that trade is brisk and money plenty.
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It should, it seems to me, be our pleasure and duty to make those people the Filipinos free, and let them deal with their own domestic questions in their own way. And so I am an anti-imperialist. I am opposed to having the eagle put its talons on any other land.
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I had now-not for the first time, nor the thousandth-trampled upon an old and wise and stern maxim of mine, to wit: 'Supposing is good, but finding out is better.'
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...my sister...was an interested and zealous invalid during sixty-five years, tried all the new diseases as fast as they came out, and always enjoyed the newest one more than any that went before; my brother had accumulated forty-two brands of Christianity before he was called away.
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Don't go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first.
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I have never taken any exercise, except sleeping and resting, and I never intend to take any.
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Do not tell fish stories where the people know you; but particularly, don't tell them where they know the fish.
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An experienced, industrious, ambitious, and often quite picturesque liar.
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It ain't those parts of the Bible that I can't understand that bother me, it is the parts that I do understand.
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...now...that I am a wise person. As for me, I wish there were some more of us in the world, for I find it lonesome.
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There is nothing in the world like a persuasive speech to fuddle the mental apparatus and upset the convictions and debauch the emotions of an audience not practised in the tricks and delusions of oratory.