Mark Twain Quotes
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Weather is a literary specialty, and no untrained hand can turn out a good article on it.
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We Americans... bear the ark of liberties of the world.
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'In the beginning of a change, the patriot is a scarce man, and brave, and hated and scorned. When his cause succeeds, the timid join him, for then it costs nothing to be a patriot'
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Adam, at Eve's grave: Wheresoever she was, THERE was Eden.
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God made the Idiot for practice, and then He made the School Board.
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How easy it is to make people believe a lie, and how hard it is to undo that work again!
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The Erie railroad kills 23 to 46; the other 845 railroads kill an average of one-third of a man each; and the rest of that million, amounting in the aggregate to that appalling figure of 987,631 corpses, die naturally in their beds! You will excuse me from taking any more chances on those beds. The railroads are good enough for me.
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She was not quite what you would call refined. She was not quite what you would call unrefined. She was the kind of person that keeps a parrot.
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My books are like water; those of the great geniuses are wine. (Fortunately) everybody drinks water.
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This poor little one-horse town.
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It is curious that physical courage should be so common in the world and moral courage so rare.
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Don't let schooling interfere with your education.
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Try as you may, you don't get down as you would from a horse, you get down as you would from a house afire. You make a spectacle of yourself every time.
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Humor must not professedly teach and it must not professedly preach, but it must do both if it would live forever.
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Everybody yelled at him, and laughed at him, and sassed him, and he sassed back, and said he'd attend to them and lay them out in their regular turns, but he couldn't wait now, because he'd come to town to kill old Colonel Sherburn, and his motto was, 'Meat first, and spoon vittles to top off on.'
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I never smoke to excess - that is, I smoke in moderation, only one cigar at a time.
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Good friends, good books and a sleepy conscience: this is the ideal life.
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He is a stranger to me, but he is a most remarkable man - and I am the other one. Between us, we cover all knowledge; he knows all that can be known, and I know the rest.
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The easy confidence with which I know another man's religion is folly teaches me to suspect that my own is also.
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She takes an undaughterful pleasure in noting that now the newspapers are beginning to concede with heartiness that she does not need the help of my name, but can make her way quite satisfactorily upon her own merits. This is insubordination, and must be crushed.
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What a wee little part of a person's life are his acts and his words! His real life is led in his head, and is known to none but himself.
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Training is everything. The peach was once a bitter almond; cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education.
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Everything has its limit - iron ore cannot be educated into gold.
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That is a simple rule, and easy to remember. When I, a thoughtful and unblessed Presbyterian, examine the Koran, I know that beyond any question every Mohammedan is insane; not in all things, but in religious matters. When a thoughtful and unblessed Mohammedan examines the Westminster Catechism, he knows that beyond any question I am spiritually insane.