Kurt Vonnegut Quotes
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I urge you to please notice when you are happy, and exclaim or murmur or think at some point, 'If this isn't nice, I don't know what is.'
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Everybody's shaking in his boots, so don't be bluffed.
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The only difference between Bush and Hitler is that Hitler was elected.
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I don't plot my books rigidly, follow a preconceived structure. A novel mustn't be a closed system - it's a quest.
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There is a tragic flaw in our precious Constitution, and I don’t know what can be done to fix it. This is it: Only nut cases want to be president.
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It was Trout’s fantasy that somebody would be outraged by the footprints. This would give him the opportunity to reply grandly, 'What is it that offends you so? I am simply using man’s first printing press. You are reading a bold and universal headline which says ,'I am here, I am here, I am here.''
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Here is a lesson in creative writing. First rule: Do not use semicolons. They are transvestite hermaphrodites representing absolutely nothing. All they do is show you've been to college.
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I'm convinced that no one can amount to a damn in the arts if he becomes sweetly reasonable, seeing all sides of a picture, forgiving all sins.
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We're terrible animals. I think that the Earth's immune system is trying to get rid of us, as well it should.
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This script, it seems to me, is the work of professionals who yearned to be as charming as inspired amateurs can sometimes be.
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Younger scientists are extremely sensitive to the moral implications of all they do.
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profanity and obscenity entitle people who don't want unpleasant information to close their ears and eyes to you.
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Derby described the incredible artificial weather that Earthlings sometimes create for other Earthlings when they don't want those other Earthlings to inhabit Earth any more.
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We could have saved the Earth but we were too damned cheap.
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I wish that people who are conventionally supposed to love each other would say to each other, when they fight, 'Please - a little less love, and a little more common decency.'
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The two real political parties in America are the Winners and the Losers. The people don’t acknowledge this. They claim membership in two imaginary parties, the Republicans and the Democrats, instead.
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It is a gruesome Disneyland. Nobody is cute there.
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Freedom of speech isn't something somebody else gives you. That's something you give to yourself.
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A chaplain's assistant is customarily a figure of fun in the American Army.
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It was an appalling thought, to be so well-integrated into the machinery of society and history as to be able to move in only one plane, and along one line.
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We don't piss in your ashtrays,So please don't throw cigarettes in our urinals.
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People need good lies. There are too many bad ones.
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During my most recently controlled near-death experience, I got to interview William Shakespeare. We did not hit it off. He said the dialect I spoke was the ugliest English he had ever heard, 'fit to split the ears of groundlings.' He asked if it had a name, and I said 'Indianapolis.'
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'This husband of yours, he’d rather have his wife a- Rather, have her-' Halyard cleared his throat- 'than go into public relations?''I’m proud to say,' said the girl, 'that he’s one of the few men on earth with a little self-respect left.'