David Sedaris Quotes
My sister Tiffany told me years ago, 'You can never write about me.' Then she called six months ago and said she wanted to be in a story. She was worried people thought I didn't like her.
Quotes to Explore
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I'm a Ninja. I'm not scared of death.
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The first thing people say to me when they meet me is, 'You're so much skinner in person.' You have to live up to these standards that are so unrealistic. I try to tune it out.
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I just find that there's something about looking back on interviews, whether for purposes of remembering what I said about something or if it's for posterity when I'm 75.
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The mind is but too naturally prone to pleasure, but too easily yielded to dissipation.
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My wife Mary and I have been married for forty-seven years and not once have we had an argument serious enough to consider divorce; murder, yes, but divorce, never.
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I'm never doing anything by rote. I'm only on thin ice, and I think that that's a good place to be. I feel like when you push yourself like that, the rewards can be pretty great.
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If my career path takes me elsewhere, that's great. But comedy is my forte.
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It excites me to go to a movie and be reminded that I'm human, and I'm filled with opposites, and I'm built with flaws. Part of growth and healing is recognizing that.
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Jordan has to show the Arab world that there's another way of doing things. We're a monarchy, yes, but if we can show democracy that leads to a two-, three-, four-party system - left, right and center - in a couple of years' time, then the Muslim Brotherhood will no longer be something to contend with.
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I love the crowds at festivals because they're so chilled out.
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I think women love very hard. We love men. We just love with everything we have. And sometimes, I don't know that that love is met with the type of dignity that we wish it would be met with.
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I love women's bodies. I love luxury.
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The success of Torn was a bit too much for me. I took a year off and was still scared to start the second album.
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I'm actually not on Twitter.
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You learn from the things that happen in your career. You get up and down. You never give up. All the things that happened in my career, thank God it happened early rather than late in my career.
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I can laugh and cry at the drop of a freakin' hat - all at the same time.
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Everybody has a story... and a scream.
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I can tell you where I was when Kennedy was shot - which was in the common room at school. I heard about it on the old valve radio. At the time of Armstrong's landing, I was at university rehearsing a play.
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I knew I didn't want to be stuck in Stoke Newington for the rest of my life, hanging about with idiots. That wasn't for me. I wanted to go out and have a look around.
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The power of forgiveness transcends personal relationships.
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I have sometimes thought the power of computers had exceeded our ability to use them, but Mr. Jobs and his team kept giving us devices that made indispensable things easier in ways you never thought of.
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I like some things other people don't like, and they like stuff I don't like.
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My sister Tiffany told me years ago, 'You can never write about me.' Then she called six months ago and said she wanted to be in a story. She was worried people thought I didn't like her.
