Demetri Martin Quotes
I got into stand-up because I love stand-up. Specifically in stand-up, I love jokes. I love short, structured ideas and a punch line.
Quotes to Explore
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There was just a lot of comedy on the TV in the house, and my parents are both very funny.
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In 2004, I went onstage for the first time. They put a mike in my hand and pushed me out the door into the crowd. I did the three songs I had recorded and got out. It was the worst day of my life.
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Clothes have to be simple and comfortable.
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I think for being not unsympathetic that their appearance may also appear, so differently it, must; similarly as with animals, which meet us in very different forms, which look somehow harmonious however all. On exactly such forms I would stand.
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I respect music, I do. I love it.
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Why do I talk about the benefits of failure? Simply because failure meant a stripping away of the inessential. I stopped pretending to myself that I was anything other than what I was, and began to direct all my energy into finishing the only work that mattered to me.
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The use of solar energy has not been opened up because the oil industry does not own the sun.
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In Hollywood they're getting younger, but believe me, it's not the food. It's the plastic surgery.
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I played didgeridoo from a young age - on the vacuum cleaner, initially.
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I can't do choreographed movement. It has to come from my heart... and my pelvis.
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My 'Big Bang Theory' costar Johnny Galecki went off the grid. He bought a huge ranch and goes there every weekend. He keeps telling me to do the same thing, but I don't know if I'm that committed. The Valley is as far off the grid as I'm going to go.
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The only instrument I can play is piano. Whenever I make songs at home, I play the piano and make them on the piano.
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I think I'm going to be around awhile.
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I was always a fan of the game, and I wouldn't have taken this job if I wasn't a fan of the game.
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I won't leave any unfinished manuscripts.
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What kind of society have we become when children in a great city cannot rely on mothers or fathers for a bowl of cereal in the morning and a brown bag with a sandwich and apple in it for lunch?
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I think, by nature you know, I'm very attracted and I gravitate toward the very strong girl who can watch a ballgame, but who's also extremely feminine.
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Al Qaeda has overplayed their hand. What the al Qaeda do when they go into a town or village or a neighborhood inside a major city is they get a stranglehold on the people themselves. They force the men to wear beards and the women to be properly costumed and essentially completely covered up.
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I don't roll like that but I've never been with a hooker either. Yeah, that's good to say in an interview cause I feel bad a little because people grew up watching me and that's a little disturbing.
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I'd love to have a little Coco if I could have my way. I always dress up my dogs and they probably hate me for it, so it would be nice to dress up a human being.
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Oh my God! I was always wondering what it would be like to run over a dried up, stinky, dick licker.
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Go ahead and play the blues if it'll make you happy.
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I grew up with injustice and could do nothing about it. But once in America, I had freedom of choice.
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I got into stand-up because I love stand-up. Specifically in stand-up, I love jokes. I love short, structured ideas and a punch line.
