Jim Gaffigan Quotes
Once you put bacon into a salad it's no longer a salad, it just becomes a game of find the bacon in the lettuce. It's like you're panning for gold, hmmmmm, EUREKA!

Quotes to Explore
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I have great stories. I am going to write a book.
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I don't know if you can catch my vibe, but I'm a pretty laid-back guy.
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I'm the worst employer I could wish for because I push myself hard.
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I started writing while I was a little boy. Maybe it's because I was reading a lot of books I admired, and thought that I would like to write something like that someday. Also, my love for good writing pushed me.
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If I'm not happy with what's going on, I try to change it myself.
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Most of the Jewish refugees, stripped of their considerable possessions, came to Israel. They were welcomed by the Jewish state. They were given shelter and support, and they were integrated into Israeli society together with half a million survivors of the European Holocaust.
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Sometimes I think that when people become famous, there's a public perception that they are not human beings any more. They don't have feelings; they don't get hurt; you can act and say as you like about them.
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A lot of people I've played with see me as a scorer and a shooter. I'm still fast and everything like that, but then, when they see me dunk, it's like 'Oh, damn.'
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I'm probably a Libertarian, if I had to put myself in any category. But you don't come out and talk about these things, for obvious reasons.
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All of technology, really, is about maximizing free options.
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I don't like rooms you never use or that are wasted space but I also like a sparseness and a cleanness.
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There's an inherent idea that if a Black executive producer and a Black director are going to do a movie based on a Black writer's book that everybody is going to be Black.
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Whenever I see a forecast written out to two decimal places, I cannot help but wonder if there is a misunderstanding of the limitations of the data, and an illusion of precision.
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You have to hit the fastball to play in the big leagues.
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I always wanted my mother to be Queen for a Day. I always used to watch that show that came on television.
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I lived on the north side of Detroit. Right down the street from me there was a young man by the name of Smokey Robinson. I was very proud to live down the street from him because he was our only celebrity in town. He was singing with the Miracles.
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I don't believe that jazz will ever really die. It's a nice way to express yourself.
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What was created by the era of the proper gentleman was excellent table manners and genocide over most of the surface of the planet.
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As the adage goes, 'fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me'... It's time for patriots everywhere to rally together again and take back America.
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You don't want to get pigeon-holed. So, I always get attracted to parts that are different from the previous ones I've played.
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The new orders have changed the balance. We took more orders, which by themselves didn’t turn any resource into a new bottleneck, but they did drastically reduce the amount of spare capacity on the non-bottlenecks, and we didn’t compensate with increased inventory in front of the bottleneck.
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Once you put bacon into a salad it's no longer a salad, it just becomes a game of find the bacon in the lettuce. It's like you're panning for gold, hmmmmm, EUREKA!