Jim Gaffigan Quotes
Gyms are always packed. The only machine available is the one that simulates the gynecological exam. You know, the Sharon Stone machine.
Quotes to Explore
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If a writer is to tell his own story - tell it slowly, and as if it were a story about other people - if he is to feel the power of the story rise up inside him, if he is to sit down at a table and patiently give himself over to this art - this craft - he must first have been given some hope.
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I did enjoy football, but the injury factor for me, you know, I had so many issues. I don't know how long my career would've been.
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I love to play chess. The last time I was playing, I started to really see the board. I don't mean just seeing a few moves ahead - something else. My game started getting better. It's the patterns. The patterns are universal.
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I am trying to do my own thing, but there will always be comparisons, even if I don't agree with them.
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We have to tell people who need help that it's OK to ask for it.
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His last 2 shows in the U.S. were in Chicago and St. Louis. I don't know what made me go on the trip with him, but I'm so very glad I did. They were two of the finest concerts I've ever seen.
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It is from weakness that people reach for dictators and concentrated government power. Only the strong can be free. And only the productive can be strong.
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I love singing and would love to record an album at some point.
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The squandering of oil and gas is associated with one of the greatest tragedies, not in the least resolved, which is suffered by humankind: climate change.
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At the same time, I would add that the American people have a lot of courage.
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One-year-olds learn concealment. Five-year-olds lie outright: they manipulate via flattery. Nine-year-olds - masters of the cover-up. By the time you enter college, you're going to lie to your mom in one out of every five interactions.
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We do a disservice to society if we ignore the evidence which shows that stable families tend to be associated with better outcomes for children.
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If the people in Britain knew the nature and disposition of the New England people as well as we do they would not find so many friends in England as I suppose they do.
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I would like to be known for honest, relatable writing and stories that that are real. There's just this shift I think is happening in a lot of society right now where being your most real self, however embarrassing or vulnerable or weird that is, is the coolest. I feel like that's what Lena Dunham's about and Amy Schumer's about.
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I like being infamous. I think it is safe being a cult.
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With me being form the South, I wanted to make this album like a G Unit.
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I'm 100 percent convinced that Pablo Escobar was a human being. And he was a very interesting one. For sure, he was a very, very, very mean and awful human being in many senses, but he wasn't an alien. He was a person. He had friends; people laughed at his jokes. And he was a very contradictory person as well.
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My house has too many distractions. There's the email. There's checking my Amazon ranking. I know I'm the only author who's ever done that, ever. There's the fax. Too many distractions. I like to go out and write.
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I just don't really like going to the gym that much, and I love eating.
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Waiting, waiting, waiting. All my life, I've been waiting for my life to begin, as if somehow my life was ahead of me, and that someday I would arrive at it.
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Meeting Oprah Winfrey, I cried like a baby. Meeting Steven Spielberg, I cried like a baby. Meeting Denzel Washington, I gushed like a crazy woman. If I don't get excited or star struck by someone I've been dying to meet, it's time to retire.
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For every quarrel a man and wife have before others, they have a hundred when alone.
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Gyms are always packed. The only machine available is the one that simulates the gynecological exam. You know, the Sharon Stone machine.
