Jim Gaffigan Quotes

Not that I don't think irreverent humor and someone being filthy is funny, I just do what I do. Any comedian would admit throwing an f-bomb in there would help get a reaction. ... I'm not on a Puritanical pursuit, but when I would curse in a joke, I believe I'm not done writing it.

Jim Gaffigan

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Quotes to Explore

• Our franchises have never been healthier. Our league, in terms of its economic footing, has never been healthier.

  

  Gary Bettman
  • Never
  • Economic
  • Been

• I think there's no greater healing power than music.

  

  Irvin Mayfield
  • Music
  • Power
  • Healing

• Every member in Congress has a seat, and they deserve a seat at the table.

  

  Dan Webster
  • Deserve
  • Congress
  • Table

• I firmly believe that any man's finest hour, the greatest fulfillment of all that he holds dear, is that moment when he has worked his heart out in a good cause and lies exhausted on the field of battle - victorious.

  

  Vince Lombardi
  • Good
  • Great
  • Believe

• Anything that is wasted effort represents wasted time. The best management of our time thus becomes linked inseparably with the best utilization of our efforts.

  

  Ted Engstrom
  • Time
  • Best
  • Effort

• I always had dreams as a kid. I definitely sat at home and watched the Oscars every year and got emotional every year at everyone's speeches.

  

  Yvonne Strahovski
  • Home
  • Emotional
  • Dreams

• I really bonded with my mom, growing up, through our love of horror movies!

  

  Garrett Clayton
  • Growing
  • Mom
  • Horror

• While cheap products are exported to western countries, the waste is dumped mostly in China's back yard, contaminating its air, water, soil and seas.

  

  Ma Jun
  • Water
  • Air
  • China

• I never thought about having a daughter, and then I had a daughter, and it was a remarkable thing. It was very different from having a son and your response to it. With a son, it's much more complex. And it's probably because of my stuff in the past. With a daughter, I was surprised at how simple it is.

  

  Sam Shepard
  • Different
  • Past
  • Simple

• Public opinion is a permeating influence, and it exacts obedience to itself; it requires us to drink other men's thoughts, to speak other men's words, to follow other men's habits.

  

  Walter Bagehot
  • Men
  • Words
  • Opinion

• Acting was something I had to do.

  

  Nancy Marchand
  • Acting
  • Something
  • Had

• I went to boarding school, and what that teaches you is to cope emotionally at a young age and to suppress a lot of emotion. Being in the army is, in a way, similar.

  

  Damian Lewis
  • School
  • Age
  • Army

• Fashion has this youth mania. But 70-year-old ladies don't have 18-year-old bodies, and 18-year-olds don't have a 70-year-old's dollars.

  

  Iris Apfel
  • Fashion
  • Youth
  • Dollars

• I love to see a wood full of bluebells. Growing up in the Kent countryside, I have special memories of this brief annual spectacle.

  

  Gary Hume
  • Memories
  • Special
  • Spectacle

• In spite of holidays when I was free to visit London theatres and explore the countryside, I spent four very miserable years as a colonial at an English school.

  

  Patrick White
  • School
  • Free
  • English

• Reading about Queen Victoria has been a passion of mine since, as a child, I came across Laurence Housman's play 'Happy and Glorious,' with its Ernest Shepard illustrations.

  

  A. N. Wilson
  • Happy
  • Reading
  • Passion

• I'm not cynical.

  

  Laura Schlessinger
  • Cynical

• It's frightening how easy it is to commit murder in America. Just a drink too much. I can see myself doing it. In England, one feels all the social restraints holding one back. But here, anything can happen.

  

  W. H. Auden
  • America
  • Myself
  • Doing

• Over the entrance to the temple at Delphi was a famous inscription: KNOW THYSELF! It reminded visitors that man must never believe himself to be more than mortal - and that no man can escape his destiny.

  

  Jostein Gaarder
  • Destiny
  • Visitors
  • Entrance

• I'll fill those canyons in your soul, like a river lead you home. And I'll walk a step behind, in the shadows so you shine. Just ask, it will be done and I will prove my love, until you're sure that I'm the one.

  

  Gary Allan
  • Love
  • Done
  • Home

• I think if your goal is for everything to be okay, that's a mistake. To achieve that goal, the only obstacle you'd have to face tomorrow is to eliminate all risk ... I've made the decision that I'm never trying to make everything okay. I'm trying for there to be more loose ends, not fewer loose ends.

  

  Seth Godin
  • Thinking
  • Trying
  • Decision

• Halloween is woke, and there's nothing we can do about it.

  

  Jason Blum
  • Halloween

• One of the great things about Churchill is that he had the guts to say the unpalatable, to level with the people, even if it cost him politically to tell them the truth.

  

  Anthony McCarten
  • People
  • Great
  • Truth

• Not that I don't think irreverent humor and someone being filthy is funny, I just do what I do. Any comedian would admit throwing an f-bomb in there would help get a reaction. ... I'm not on a Puritanical pursuit, but when I would curse in a joke, I believe I'm not done writing it.

  

  Jim Gaffigan
  • Believe
  • Thinking
  • Writing