Jim Gaffigan Quotes
I don't know, I find that honestly, the stand-up thing in some ways is a little bit of a cliche to carry around, because people don't consider stand-ups really actors.

Quotes to Explore
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Maybe 10 times a year I'll do a corporate date, but no casinos or no nightclubs or no comedy clubs.
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It is often said by religious people that without its framework, there is no sense of right or wrong. My view is that religion comes after ethics.
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I cannot control what goes on in another lane and this is how I focus on the Games. There is no point in being nervous of other swimmers. It's just about focusing on yourself and what you need to do in order to perform at your best.
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I certainly keep my eye on Washington all the time because often life is stranger than fiction.
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May Heaven be propitious, and smile on the cause of my country.
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Most people are interested in seeing 27-year-old women who are in movies somehow connected to sex. It's interesting to everyone. Especially little movies that are having trouble getting made, there's always sex.
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Questions that require answers are what keep readers going - and the place to start raising those questions is with your very first sentence.
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I am an unrepentant tweetaholic. I use the communications service all day long to discover news, interesting tidbits and, of course, to flack the work of our tech and media news site, Re/code.
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There's an obligation to not lead people down the wrong path, but I hardly think me wearing short shorts on stage is creating monsters.
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Though I am a Catholic, a professing one, I have serious doubts about the survival of the human personality after death.
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Midi is my hobby.
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I love going to the cinema. Whenever I get time off, that's where I go.
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The mere holding of slaves, therefore, is a condition having per se nothing of moral character in it, any more than the being a parent, or employer, or ruler.
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Relationships are people's No. 1 priorities. They want to have good relationships, and a lot of times they don't.
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The most important thing to realise is that everyone is capable of telling a story. It doesn't matter where we were born or how we grew up.
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The things I learned from the army - and I think it was a lesson for life - was how to work in unison with other people. How to take responsibility.
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I don't have to be a size zero anymore. But I still want to feel and look good.
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The major political battles about guns in our society concern handguns and assault weapons, not long arms like hunting rifles.
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When I started drama school, theatre was the main draw. I never had any movie star notions. Not that there were family ties to the theatre, either.
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About two-thirds of bachelor's degree holders borrow to go to school, and on average they're graduating with more than $26,000 in debt.
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At what point then is the approach of danger to be expected? I answer, if it ever reach us, it must spring up amongst us. It cannot come from abroad. If destruction be our lot, we must ourselves be its author and finisher. As a nation of freemen, we must live through all time, or die by suicide.
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That requires only one kind of defense policy, a policy summed up in a single word 'first.' I do not mean 'first, if,' I do not mean 'first, but,' I do not mean 'first, when,' but I mean 'First, period.'
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Ecology is a dirty seven-letter word to many people. They are like heavy sleepers refusing to be aroused. 'Leave me alone! It's not time to get up yet!'
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I don't know, I find that honestly, the stand-up thing in some ways is a little bit of a cliche to carry around, because people don't consider stand-ups really actors.