Jim Gaffigan Quotes
You ever read an article, and at the bottom, it says, 'Continued on page six'? I'm , 'Not for me. I'm done.'

Quotes to Explore
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I know what feels good to eat and what doesn't. I try to err on the side of choices I know will leave me feeling more energized and ready to go, because it's always better to feel healthy.
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I went to bed last night dreaming of tuna melts. I love food.
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Stories are like that. Like cities, they are built on the stones and bones of the past.
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I would literally have to go meet people so they could see I didn't have big red hair and wear high heels constantly. It was just really ingrained in people.
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Happiness is only attained by the free will agreeing in its freedom to accord with the will of God.
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Inauguration Day is like two ships passing in the night: the new staff moving in while the other walks out, taking one final look at the White House lawn as they leave with their cardboard box of possessions.
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My work always presents problems in our society. Those problems may be anything from injustice to freedom, and everything related to humanity.
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I would really love to collaborate with Gwen Stefani and M.I.A.; artists that kind of make sense with me vocally. And in terms of style, I'm a very visual artist. I really love Pharell. I love people that really care about drums, and I like beat-heavy.
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To be the outsider is actually a great thing in England.
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I can't go on Gawker. I actually think the writing is really funny, but there is a chance that somebody is undercutting me.
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My wife and I both come from Irish families. There are two kinds of Irish families: the hitting kind and the kidding kind. If you're fortunate - and both of us are - you come from the kidding kind of Irish family.
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There are some days when I think I'm going to die from an overdose of satisfaction.
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No man has the right to use the great powers of the Presidency to lead the people, indirectly, into war.
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Opinions differ most when there is least scientific warrant for having any.
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Why doesn't anyone remember that the Palestinians already had four real opportunities to establish their state, yet each time they preferred to revert to terrorism?
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Many years ago, in the throes of my struggles on the PGA Tour, I had difficulty even getting into pro-ams. I needed money, so I put together a 45-minute magic show I'd perform at corporate events surrounding the tournament.
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You don't have love without sacrifice; you can't have sacrifice without love.
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We are the rebels asking for the storm, and believing that truth is only to be found in an endless search. If the 'World Spirit' touches you, do not expect that it will be painless.
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Life is mortal. There are all these rewards and consequences. Sometimes you embrace them, and sometimes they knock you over.
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During the holidays, I often see my sisters, who still, even after all these years, can't always seem to agree with me. They take silly, indefensible positions, such as denying that my parents loved me more because I was the better child.
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They say the first thing to go is your legs, then it's your reflexes, then it's your friends.
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He never went mad in your sense. My dear fellow, you're very much wrong if you think there was anything pathological about him - then. The man was brilliantly sane. His mind was as keen as a keen sword. I couldn't understand him, but I could judge of his sanity right enough.
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After the fighting is done, and even when it's still happening, apologies are often needed for the recounting of bare facts. Sometimes bare facts feel unpatriotic.
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You ever read an article, and at the bottom, it says, 'Continued on page six'? I'm , 'Not for me. I'm done.'