John Oliver Quotes
Quotes to Explore
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Clothes are a big part of a free society, I think, and what you wear is so indicative of the political climate you're living in.
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I don't believe in alcohol. It's a sort of a medicinal necessity for the human condition, none of that stuff. I'm not a gambling man.
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Both sides of the aisle - Republican and Democrat - have been unwilling and afraid to address the deficit, and someone's got to.
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People know more about baseball players' contracts than they do about the policies that govern the fate of our children's lives in twenty years. Think about it. People used to say, the whole time I was growing up, 'Do you want to bring a child into this world?' That's pretty dire.
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Everybody in my band is a lion, and everyone's mastered their own domain... And we have a platform, and we have built it painstakingly and punched ourselves in the face every way we could to get where we are.
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This world was not created piecemeal. Africa was born no later and no earlier than any other geographical area on this globe. Africans, no more and no less than other men, possess all human attributes, talents and deficiencies, virtues and faults.
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I believe it is impossible to be sure of anything.
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I loved 'Monsoon Wedding' and 'Lunchbox' because they had 'real' stories. I wish there are more films made like them.
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I am a Republican because the United States is a republic, and the views we hold represent the foundation our country was built on so many years ago.
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To end the pervasive culture of sexual harassment, it can no longer be the norm that men look the other way. It only ends when men actively participate in ending it.
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The carrying power of a bridge is not the average strength of the pillars, but the strength of the weakest pillar. I have always believed that you do not measure the health of a society by GNP but by the condition of its worst off.
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Only crime and the criminal, it is true, confront us with the perplexity of radical evil; but only the hypocrite is really rotten to the core.
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Every retailer, when they price their goods, looks at their total cost overall. When they have costs go up, they'll price their products accordingly.
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I like to play what I call a-motional golf. Emotion doesn't grab me that much.
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You never get to pick how you get pinned and how people perceive you.
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I'm very scared sometimes that fashion might attack its own magic by the amount of exposure.
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Among our responsibilities is to make sure that 23 percent of all government contracts go to small businesses. That's about $150 billion annually, from all the government agencies.
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When the doctor told me I had cancer, I was scared.
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You only cry for help if you believe there is help to cry for.
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English girls' schools today providing the higher education are, so far as my knowledge goes, worthily representative of that astonishing rise in the intellectual standards of women which has taken place in the last half-century.
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Making money from enforcing patents is no more wrong than investing in preferred stock.
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There is a need to find and sing our own song, to stretch our limbs and shake them in a dance so wild that nothing can roost there, that stirs the yearning for solitary voyage.
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If you dream the proper dreams, and share the myths with people, they will want to grow up to be like you.
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Americans just don't understand dry wit.
