Jonathan Swift Quotes
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Good manners is the art of making those people easy with whom we converse. Whoever makes the fewest people uneasy is the best bred in the room.
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Then, rising with Aurora's light, The Muse invoked, sit down to write; Blot out, correct, insert, refine, Enlarge, diminish, interline.
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Brutes find out where their talents lie; A bear will not attempt to fly, A foundered horse will oft debate Before he tries a five barred gate. A dog by instinct turns aside Who sees the ditch too deep and wide, But man we find the only creature Who, led by folly, combats nature; Who, when she loudly cries-Forbear! With obstinacy fixes there; And where the genius least inclines, Absurdly bends his whole designs.
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My hunger serves me instead of a clock.
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No wise man ever wished to be younger.
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An idle reason lessens the weight of the good ones you gave before.
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Those dreams that on the silent night intrude, and with false flitting shapes our minds delude ... are mere productions of the brain. And fools consult interpreters in vain.
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Many a truth is told in jest.
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Walls have tongues, and hedges ears.
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I have ever hated all nations, professions, and communities, and all my love is toward individuals: for instance, I hate the tribe of lawyers, but I love Counsellor Such-a-one, and Judge Such-a-one: so with physicians - I will not speak of my own trade - soldiers, English, Scotch, French, and the rest. But principally I hate and detest that animal called man, although I heartily love John, Peter, Thomas, and so forth. This is the system upon which I have governed myself many years, but do not tell.
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All panegyrics are mingled with an infusion of poppy.
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A true critic, in the perusal of a book, is like a dog at a feast, whose thoughts and stomach are wholly set upon what the guests fling away, and consequently is apt to snarl most when there are the fewest bones.
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I have known some men possessed of good qualities which were very serviceable to others, but useless to themselves; like a sun-dial on the front of a house, to inform the neighbours and passengers, but not the owner within.
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Fine words! I wonder where you stole them.
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An English tongue, if refined to a certain standard, might perhaps be fixed forever.
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If the men of wit and genius would resolve never to complain in their works of critics and detractors, the next age would not know that they ever had any.
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Last week I saw a woman flayed, and you will hardly believe, how much it altered her person for the worse.
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Men are happy to be laughed at for their humor, but not for their folly.
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Power is no blessing in itself, except when it is used to protect the innocent.
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Ale is meat, drink and cloth; it will make a cat speak and a wise man dumb.
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A chuck under the chin is worth two kisses.
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I never knew any man cured of inattention.
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There are few wild beasts more to be dreaded than a talking man having nothing to say.
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A Child will make two Dishes at an Entertainment for Friends; and when the Family dines alone, the fore or hind Quarter will makea reasonable Dish; and seasoned with a little Pepper or Salt, will be very good Boiled on the fourth Day, especially in Winter.