Erma Bombeck Quotes
A grandparent is the only baby-sitter who doesn't charge more after midnight - or anything before midnight.
Quotes to Explore
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I remember reading the cruelest, most awful thing about my hair online. A person speculated about who I was as a person and even read into my personal life based solely off my hairstyle. He or she said I must be lazy because I have short hair. It was just devastating.
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There was a point where I really felt I had 'penniless divorcee lone parent' tattooed on my head.
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My wife, Caroline Spector, and I pitched some comic ideas to various publishers back in the '80s, but nothing ever came of it.
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And the basis on which we agreed to operate with them involved a manifesto, where it states that we proceed from different ideologies and policies. One thing that we insisted on was that they should take an oath to reject racism and discrimination.
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I have the same friends and the same bad habits.
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In Australia, there is a very famous show called 'Home and Away.' I was cast on that at 15. The day I started filming, my life changed.
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I always like to look at things and think, 'Would I be proud to bring my grandma and grandpa to come see me in this?' And if I wouldn't want them to see it, then it's not something that I should immortalize myself on film in.
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The man who is denied the opportunity of taking decisions of importance begins to regard as important the decisions he is allowed to take.
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My grandma and my mom are not happy about the fact that I am still a bachelor. It's not on my mind that I have to find the person I'm going to spend the rest of my life with. It will happen the way it's going to happen.
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Is it a recent occurrence that women have tried to control when and if they reproduced? Absolutely not. By 2000 B.C., there was worldwide use of herbal potions to prevent pregnancy. Condoms were made from animal bladders.
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Washington is an endless series of mock palaces clearly built for clerks.
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I am not like my image; I take my work so seriously. Everyone thinks I just bounce in, but I study and everything has to be just right.
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The free market punishes irresponsibility. Government rewards it.
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Love is a gracious host to his guests though to the unbidden his house is a mirage and a mockery. Now you would have me explain the miracles of Jesus. We are all the miraculous gesture of the moment; our Lord and Master was the centre of that moment. Yet it was not in His desire that His gestures be known.
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I feel like it's my responsibility and my obligation to stand up and to say that which I believe to be the truth.
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The web is democratising and also the voice of people who don't think they have another outlet. And that voice can be punitive.
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I am scared every day.
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I save my money, brother. I don't spend what I don't make.
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Creativity is very selfish. Scandalously so, in fact.
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I'm a big eater. I mean, a lot of my stand-up is about food, and you write about what you know, and that's the only thing I know. I don't know anything else.
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I'm insatiably curious.
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Taking care of myself used to be at the bottom of my list, but I'm all about wellness.
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A grandparent is the only baby-sitter who doesn't charge more after midnight - or anything before midnight.
