Sandra Bernhard Quotes
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Onstage, I'm still wearing my fabulous, sheer dresses because I'm not that big.
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My family wasn't the Brady Bunch. They were the Broody Bunch.
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I would never wanna do a show that's strictly maudlin and invaded my personal life and my home. I would never do that.
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I am always hoping to do another CD. This atmosphere has been difficult.
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I think people are a little bit intimidated by me. You know, I'm not exactly a wilting flower, so I think they're a little bit scared of me sometimes.
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For most of my relationships, I would have liaisons, and I would feel guilty.
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I'm a sexual person. A lot of different people turn me on and have over the years, and I've always wanted to make it very clear that this was not coming from some sort of antimale point of view.
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People feel like if they don't have a voice or a name or the spotlight, then they're invisible. But if you can't wake up in your world, in your life, with your family and your friends, and enjoy it, then forget it. All bets are off, because that's all anybody is guaranteed.
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I'll take on somebody if they're offending the entire culture, not just offending me.
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I don't like surgery. I don't like elective surgery, I don't like surgery that you have to have.
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I think Bush is amateurish and self-serving, and frankly, it's disgusting.
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You don't need to be famous to live a life as an artist.
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On one side you have book burners, Congressional wives and Pat Robertson. On the other side, you have vulgar comedians, foul-mouthed rap groups and Dennis Hopper—all your choices should be so easy.
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Barbara Bush has her finger on the pulse of America. Im so glad shes back and more compassionate than ever, ... Thats right, of course people just sat around New Orleans, boring, uninspired, soulless New Orleans, and dreamed of someday relocating to the Astrodome. Oh, dear Lord, if only I could leave my unhappy existence and head on up to wonderful Houston and live with my friends side by side in a spacious football stadium, my life would be so much richer and complete.
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I'm very much an optimist. I don't think I could do my work if I didn't believe there was some kind of hope for humanity.
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From the time I was a kid, I'd never joined groups. I hated high school groups. I hung out with hippies, musical people. I hung out with whomever I found compelling and interesting and smart. And I continued to do that throughout my life.
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When I was really little, I was skinny and people laughed at me for being skinny, so, we all pay our dues for the bodies we're in one way or another. But thank god I haven't needed to alter it to feel good about myself.
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People want to be famous, they want to be loved, they want to be accepted. They want to push aside their past and the things that have been embarrassing to them.
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I'm the only actress in Hollywood who didn't pay to have these lips.
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Madonnas got one big choice. Take a couple of years off and become a human being.
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At some point, the pride has to be a part of the whole day-to-day oeuvre. It's part of who you are and doesn't need to be discussed anymore.
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When you're constantly looking for things from other people, you're not looking within yourself.
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It's depressing sitting at a comedy club all night, waiting to get on to do your five or ten minutes of material.
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I try to avoid people's eyes because I don't like to get that intimate with just anybody. i don't need the responsibility.