Scott Aukerman Quotes
I probably could be a world-class screenwriter by now if I had spent the kind of work I devote on Comedy Death-Ray to that. But I do okay, in that regard. I mean, my stuff gets bought, so it's all right.
Quotes to Explore
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I'm a capitalist but one who is smallist and localist, and who favours businesses where owners are still in charge.
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It seems to me that in literature, books have always been answers to other books.
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I never give advice unless someone asks me for it. One thing I've learned, and possibly the only advice I have to give, is to not be that person giving out unsolicited advice based on your own personal experience.
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You should never do anything too much. If you only eat healthy food, that is too much. Success is balance - a banker with no time with his kids, he's not successful. If he doesn't have time to walk his kids to school, that is not success - that is a mistake.
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Warren Beatty once told me that if someone's really stuck on you, find them their next boyfriend. But I could never do that.
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America slept because most Americans preferred it that way.
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When George W. Bush entered office, the national debt was $5 trillion. When he left, it was $10 trillion. I think the administration spent too much money.
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I can never believe how much time and energy and money and talent and everything else is being poured into horrible ideas.
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You won't find me in a romantic comedy. Those movies don't speak to me. People don't come to talk to me about those scripts, because they probably think I'm this dark, twisted, miserable person.
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New online formats gutted the newspaper-ad business. Why pore over tiny print looking for a job in the want ads when you can tap a few keywords into monster.com, then click through and apply? Why pay a steep per-character rate for a classified when you can hawk a whole garage full of used stuff on EBay or Craigslist for free?
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Islam is fixed, stable, ordered and disciplined, and so are Muslims.
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I kinda went through a semi-depression. Honestly. Like, I lost myself.
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It's just fun to be in Paris.
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It would be ridiculous to say I don't want to sell records, but I trust my taste.
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I'd love to work with Michael Buble, with Tony Bennett, with Damian Marley, with Andrea Bocelli.
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The only prize much cared for by the powerful is power.
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I can get a black eye, a bloody nose. I can have a bad day in the gym. At the end of the day, I don't have a bad payday, and I don't have a bad night under the lights... I get bumps, bruises... but I don't have a bad night.
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I'd like to go back to standup. I don't like to think I've done my last gig. At the moment it terrifies me, I get really nervous. It's a great buzz when it goes well.
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So long as I'm president, communism will not thrive here.
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We have to be a team that's going to be a little bit grimy, we're going to have to go after every loose ball that we can, we're going to have to be the team that dives on the floor.
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From the freedom to explore comes the joy of learning. From knowledge acquired by personal initiative arises the desire for more knowledge. And from mastery of the novel and beautiful world awaiting every child comes self-confidence.
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I started working with friends of mine and that, to some degree, continues.
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I've never been against doing business with Cuba.
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I probably could be a world-class screenwriter by now if I had spent the kind of work I devote on Comedy Death-Ray to that. But I do okay, in that regard. I mean, my stuff gets bought, so it's all right.
