W. S. Gilbert Quotes
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If I can wheedle
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To sit in solemn silence on a dull, dark dock in a pestilential prison with a life-long lock awaiting the sensation of a short, sharp shock from a cheap and chippy chopper on a big, black block.
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I shall carry to the Catacombs of Age,
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When everyone is somebody, then no one's anybody.
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The idiot who praises, with enthusiastic tone, All centuries but this, and every country but his own.
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Bow, bow, ye lower middle classes!
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Though I'm anything but clever, I could talk like that forever.
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In all the woes that curse our race there is a lady in the case.
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I know everybody's income and what everybody earns,
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The Law is the true embodiment of everything that's excellent; it has no kind of fault or flaw and I, my Lords, embody the Law.
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No one can have a higher opinion of him than I have; and I think he's a dirty little beast.
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See how the Fates their gifts allot, For A is happy-B is not. Yet B is worthy, I dare say, Of more prosperity than A.
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In the discovery of secret things and in the investigation of hidden causes, stronger reasons are obtained from sure experiments and demonstrated arguments than from probable conjectures and the opinions of philosophical speculators of the common sort.
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I am a courtier grave and serious Who is about to kiss your hand: Try to combine a pose imperious With a demeanour nobly bland.
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The privilege and pleasure That we treasure beyond measure Is to run on little errands for the Ministers of State.
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When a felon s not engaged in his employment, Or maturing his felonious little plans, His capacity for innocent enjoyment Is just as great as any honest mans.
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Then a sentimental passion of a vegetable fashion must excite your
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I am a child of Nature, and take after my mother.
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I'm very good at integral and differential calculus, I know the scientific names of beings animalculous; In short, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral, I am the very model of a modern Major-General.
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I always voted at my party's call, and I never thought of thinking for myself at all.
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When you are lying awake with a dismal headache, and repose is tabooed by anxiety, I conceive you may use any language you choose to indulge in without impropriety.
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Let the punishment fit the crime.
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Darwinian man, though well-behaved, at best is only a monkey shaved.
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Isn't your life extremely flat,With nothing to grumble at?