Dane Cook Quotes

We're all gonna lie, we're all gonna cry, and we're all gonna take painful shits. loud cheer Yeah. You could be man of the year or woman of the universe. You're gonna be in your bathroom one day, goin' 'Aah! Ugh! Are there glass shards in my anus?! Aah!' Somewhere, Halle Berry is clutching her Oscar, goin' 'Aah! Aah! Why me? I'm an Oscar winner!'

Dane Cook

• Why
• Universe
• Cheer

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Quotes to Explore

• I was just finishing up 'Spotlight' in Toronto - I finished it on a Tuesday and started 'True Detective' on a Friday. So I was missing rehearsals, unfortunately, which I hate and why I never like to work back-to-back.

  

  Rachel McAdams
  • Up
  • Work
  • Why

• People desire power. I don't know why they want it so. It seems to me it implies a hugely superior intellect which separates them from most of the populace.

  

  F. Murray Abraham
  • People
  • Why
  • Power

• The kitchen is where we deal with the elements of the universe. It is where we come to understand our past and ourselves.

  

  Laura Esquivel
  • Past
  • Universe
  • Understand

• I'm not trying to be Mr. Universe, but I want to stay in shape.

  

  Calvin Klein
  • Trying
  • Want
  • Universe

• If you've been in a film that's seen by millions and millions and millions of people, you're more likely to be recognized for that than for your theater performances, which were seen by considerably less people. Why would I get upset by that?

  

  Ian Mckellen
  • People
  • Why
  • Upset

• Do what you really want to do. That's why God put you on this earth.

  

  J. Carter Brown
  • God
  • Why
  • Want

• Sex is the most beautiful thing that can take place between a happily married man and his secretary.

  

  Barry Humphries
  • Beautiful
  • Man
  • Sex

• The moment is ripe for an experienced businessman to talk practical, prudent economics to the electorate - which is why Mitt Romney's political fortunes are steadily being resurrected from the grave.

  

  Camille Paglia
  • Why
  • Political
  • Moment

• To be more childlike, you don't have to give up being an adult. The fully integrated person is capable of being both an adult and a child simultaneously. Recapture the childlike feelings of wide-eyed excitement, spontaneous appreciation, cutting loose, and being full of awe and wonder at this magnificent universe.

  

  Wayne Dyer
  • Up
  • Universe
  • Wonder

• Young readers are the most challenging, demanding, and rewarding of audiences. Adults often ask why I write for the younger set. My reply: 'I can't think of anyone I'd rather write for.'

  

  Karen Hesse
  • Why
  • Think
  • Young

• I think that's why often people in creative fields can feel so alone is because there's a constant third eye, that constant watcher.

  

  Oscar Isaac
  • People
  • Why
  • Alone

• People have different takes on clothes and what to wear and colors and all that stuff, so why make a big deal about uniformity? It took me a long time to grasp that particular concept, simply because I was coming from the James Brown thing. Again, I wouldn't trade that experience for anything.

  

  Maceo Parker
  • People
  • Time
  • Different

• I believe it's a woman's right to decide what she wants to wear and if a woman can go to the beach and wear nothing, then why can't she also wear everything?

  

  Malala Yousafzai
  • Believe
  • Why
  • She

• I'm not one of those people who's so blinded by my own work and my sweat. It's kind of risky writing a memoir when you're really part of a larger universe.

  

  Questlove
  • People
  • Work
  • Writing

• I think if you're fame-hungry, go out to a nightclub and get drunk... why do that? I don't understand how some people would want fame so bad that they'd go out and get negative attention to earn it.

  

  Zac Efron
  • People
  • Why
  • Bad

• I probably prefer comedy. Why? I'm not sure. I feel like the energy of a comedy is a better fit for me. I try to be a happy guy! It seems that most of my life has the energy more for a comedy than for drama. I'm grateful to do both, but I would have to lean towards the comedy side of acting.

  

  Cameron Mathison
  • Life
  • Why
  • Happy

• I was very clear that I wanted to keep 'Thor' out of the rest of the Marvel universe for no less than the first six issues. And the success of the book, I think, speaks well to that decision.

  

  J. Michael Straczynski
  • Book
  • Success
  • Universe

• The most important issue for the killer is the ability to get a victim easily and successfully.

  

  Pat Brown
  • Important
  • Most
  • Victim

• There's an entire universe in every single tweet, and it all really depends on the content as far as how it's going to spread.

  

  Jack Dorsey
  • Single
  • Universe
  • Content

• Newsmen believe that news is a tacitly acknowledged fourth branch of the federal system. This is why most news about government sounds as if it were federally mandated -- serious, bulky and blandly worthwhile, like a high-fiber diet set in type.

  

  P. J. O'Rourke
  • Believe
  • Why
  • High

• Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former.

  

  Albert Einstein
  • Universe
  • Human
  • Stupidity

• I made one untitled piece.

  

  Damien Hirst
  • Made
  • Piece

• A friend is a lot of things, but a critic isn't.

  

  Bernard Williams
  • Friend

• We're all gonna lie, we're all gonna cry, and we're all gonna take painful shits. loud cheer Yeah. You could be man of the year or woman of the universe. You're gonna be in your bathroom one day, goin' 'Aah! Ugh! Are there glass shards in my anus?! Aah!' Somewhere, Halle Berry is clutching her Oscar, goin' 'Aah! Aah! Why me? I'm an Oscar winner!'

  

  Dane Cook
  • Why
  • Universe
  • Cheer