Leslie Jones Quotes
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When my brother passed away... I made a decision that I might die soon, and if I die, I want people to know who I really am.
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I honestly believe that people sit behind their computers and just get really brave.
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I just knew that I was funny, and I knew that it was just a matter of time. I didn't know what was going to actually happen - this is definitely way bigger than I thought - but I knew there was no way I was going to be that funny, and nobody was going to notice it.
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I always knew about comedy; I always loved comedy.
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I had all the intentions of being the next Eddie Murphy.
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I love the people at my job. I love my boss. I love my camera men, I love my crew - because they all surrounded me with straight love.
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You know what makes me mad about 'The Bachelorette?' That, you know, that that chick would get a man. Get me a date.
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When we did this reboot, I thought 'Ghostbusters' fans would be so excited: 'They've got the new technology - the ghosts are going to look real now.'
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Think about back in the day when we had Archie Bunker, 'The Jeffersons.' We had stuff to sit down and share and laugh at. The Internet has made it so we don't have to sit together anymore. It's so self-absorbed. No one has to talk to each other anymore, and people don't realize that that is killing us.
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There was a time where I knew I was as funny as many dudes, but I had people telling me, 'You have to wear a dress onstage. You need to be more feminine.'
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Why is being a woman so surprising? There are two sexes. A man and a woman. So, if it's not a man in a movie, what else was it going to be?
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I take care of everybody. I'm either hugging you or making sure that you're not sick, because my backpack has every kind of medicine in it.
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I'm glad this whole success thing is happening now. I can't even imagine a 23-year-old Leslie in this position.
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Every black comedian in the country knew what I could do. But that doesn't mean everyone else is paying attention.
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I get real brave when I text people. When I text people, I am so brave because it's words, but you can't say stuff.
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As soon as I touched the mic, I knew that's what I would do for the rest of my life.
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The big percentage is us, the real people, and we have to say something. You have to speak up. You have to.
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Hate speech and freedom of speech are two different things.
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When I was young, my dad always let me listen to comedy albums.
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The day that I saw Whoopi Goldberg on television, I cried so hard because I kept looking at my daddy going, 'Oh my God. There's somebody on TV that looks like me! She looks like me! Yay! I can be on TV! I can be on TV! I can do it! Look at her - look at her! She looks just like me.'
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I've perfected the art of busting on people. That's how comedians show each other love.
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Bill Murray was just so funny to me - there wasn't anything spooking him.
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They redid 'Roots,' and everyone was saying, 'Oh, it shouldn't have been done.' I was like, 'It definitely should have been done.' Because it needs to be refurbished for the new generation so they can understand it.
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I'm really good at standup. I always win at standup.