Amy Poehler Quotes
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Aw, I feel bad if [Taylor] was upset. I am a feminist, and she is a young and talented girl. That being said, I do agree I am going to hell. But for other reasons. Mostly boring tax stuff.
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I've said this before, that, when you're in school and you're the class clown, men are really good at making fun at other people and women are really good at making fun of themselves.
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Anybody who doesn't make you feel good, kick them to the curb. And the earlier you start in your life, the better.
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Sleep and I do not have a good relationship. We have never been good friends. I am constantly chasing sleep and then pushing it away. A good night's sleep is my white whale. Like Ahab, I am also a total drama queen about it. I love to talk about how little sleep I get. I brag about it, as if it is a true indication of how hard I work.
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The federal government began investigating allegations of fraud against the Coalition Provisional Authority, a U.S. contractor accused in a bid-rigging operation involving millions of dollars. Asked to comment, a spokesperson for Halliburton said, 'Millions? With an M? That is adorable.'
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During an interview with Katie Couric Tuesday, Sarah Palin says she is not opposed to gay people, adding 'One of my absolute best friends for the last 30 years happens to be gay and I love her dearly and she doesn't exist.'
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In my twenties I tried cocaine, which I instantly loved but eventually hated. Cocaine is terrific if you want to hang out with people you don't know very well and play Ping-Pong all night. It's bad for almost everything else.
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I think chemistry is about not acting, but reacting, and not talking, but listening.
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I also love being able to do something that kids and families can enjoy because I have two children of my own and I want them to grow up watching all the fabulous animated movies and cartoons that I loved to watch as a kid.
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I want to be around people that do things. I don't want to be around people anymore that judge or talk about what people do. I want to be around people who dream and support and do things.
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You can tell someone you love them first. You can try to speak only the truth for a whole week. You can jump out of an airplane or spend Christmas Day all by your lonesome. You can help people who need help and fight real bad guys. You can dance fast or take an improv class or do one of those Ironman things… Adventure and danger can be good for your heart and soul.
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Try putting your iPhones down every once in a while and look at people's faces.
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I like bossy girls. I always have. I like people filled with life.
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Fighting aging is like the War on Drugs. It's expensive, does more harm than good, and has been proven to never end.
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Believe me, blond hair can take you really far, especially with the older men. It can really distract from the face. I am convinced I could have had sex with both Tony Bennett and John McCain if we weren't each happily married at the time we all met.
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We don't want to be afraid to make a choice because we're afraid to make a mistake because most decisions aren't final. Feelings change all the time. You can always change your mind and taking risks and making choices is what makes life so exciting because we never know what's going to happen. Every day something new comes our way.
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Only at the Golden Globes do the beautiful people of film rub shoulders with the rat-faced people in television.
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If I wanted to see Jonah Hill masturbate at a pool party, I'd go to one of Jonah Hill's pool parties.
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President Bush threw out the first pitch Monday at Cincinnati's great American ball park. 18 Iraqis were killed.
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We have to agree beforehand to divide the funniest lines between us. But Tina [Fey] is so brilliant that I just love every moment working with her and also just hanging out together as friends.
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Sleep helps you win at life.
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A new poll reveals that 56% of Americans believe that Wal-Mart is bad for the country, while the other 44% work there.
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Sometimes painful things can teach us lessons that we didn't think we needed to know.
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Rooting for other people's failure does get in the way of your success...when you can wish good things for people and rejoice when they get it, so many gifts and blessings come to you that you can't even imagine.