Andy Rooney Quotes
Quotes to Explore
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Bush already gave obscene tax breaks to people like me and Warren Buffet, and we are saying it's not fair.
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I feel funny about owning art. I don't really want to say: 'Wow, come and see my Monet - it's in a dark room at the bottom of my cellar.'
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Scepticism, that dry caries of the intelligence.
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The regime is afraid of the people because it knows that free and fair elections will bring about its end.
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What I've learned is that you really don't need to be a celebrity or have money or have the paparazzi following you around to be famous.
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Moral authority is never retained by any attempt to hold on to it. It comes without seeking and is retained without effort.
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I was working at the NSA. I don't know, I was just bored. I just knew that's not what I was supposed to be doing with my life.
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Times change. The farmer's daughter now tells jokes about the traveling salesman.
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I create from a place of passion. It's like a pregnancy, where you create from a place of passion, and then it grows, and then before you know it, you want to push that baby out.
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I just happen to have one of those skill sets that allows me to work in my underwear.
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I'm not a best-seller, but through translations, I've accumulated some money.
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I don't sit and write stand-up material; I come up with an idea onstage.
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Someday, I have no doubt, the dead from today's wars will be seen with a similar sense of sorrow at needless loss and folly as those millions of men who lie in the cemeteries of France and Belgium - and tens of millions of Americans will feel a similar revulsion for the politicians and generals who were so spendthrift with others' lives.
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Do the difficult things while they are easy and do the great things while they are small. A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single step.
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I hold this to be the highest task for a bond between two people: that each protects the solitude of the other.
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The sad fact is that it would be fair to say that United is a generic, bureaucratic, tired company. A sort of DMV in the sky. No real culture. No real strategy. No real expectations for employees or customers. All of which is a shame.
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Stephen Colbert used to be my friend. I even signed the poor baby's cast when he hurt his hand.
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Biochemistry is the science of life. All our life processes - walking, talking, moving, feeding - are essentially chemical reactions. So biochemistry is actually the chemistry of life, and it's supremely interesting.
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What higher art does is to invite us in and allow us to make decisions.
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I'm pretty slapstick in my life but nobody sees that. You get typecast. I'm from New York and I have a sh*t-detector that's outspoken. I'm very streetwise and the producers detect that. So they get me on a movie and kill me. I go into their offices and I'm sure when I leave they say, 'You know, he'd be great to kill'. I've been killed every way you can imagine.
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Oh! The good times when we were so unhappy.
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Well then I'd certainly be a damned fool to feel any other way, wouldn't I?
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I struggle as a writer, and I'm convinced that if I was at school now, I'd be termed as having ADS. Two minutes and I'm drifting.
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I've learned... that we should be glad God doesn't give us everything we ask for.