Andy Rooney Quotes
-
Some people who hated Americans set out to kill a lot of us and they succeeded [on 9/11]....We're trying to protect ourselves with more weapons. We have to do it, I guess, but it might be better if we figured out how to behave as a nation in a way that wouldn't make so many people in the world want to kill us.
-
I've learned .... That opportunities are never lost; someone will take the ones you miss.
-
The teacher who knows the most about a subject isn't necessarily the one who can teach it best.
-
I've done a lot of complaining here, but of all the things I've complained about, I can't complain about my life.
-
Elephants and grandchildren never forget.
-
Where some people may see loving grandparents, I see a pair of feckless boobs who can't drive, take way too long to shop, and don't even have the most basic grasps on the new technology. As a staunch supporter of the principles of Darwinism, I think that advances in modern medicine are starting to overrule the survival of the fittest, and it's to our [youngers'] detriment.
-
I believe the money I make belongs to me and my family, not some governmental stooge with a bad comb-over who wants to give it away to crack addicts for squirting out babies.
-
I often pass a farm with cows grazing in the field and I think to myself how terrible it is that human beings grow other animals just to kill them and eat them. Most of us think of vegetarians as nuts and I'm not a vegetarian but I wouldn't be surprised if we came to a time in 50 or 100 years when civilized people everywhere refused to eat animals.
-
I like animals who trust people.
-
I've learned ... that no one is perfect until you fall in love with them.
-
I am interested in details. If you go into anything far enough, you get into the details of it, and people turn out to be interested in what makes things work.
-
A woman over 30 will never wake you in the middle of the night to ask, "What are you thinking?". She doesn't care what you think.
-
I've learned... That love, not time, heals all wounds.
-
Always keep your words soft and sweet, just in case you have to eat them.
-
Why am I an atheist? I ask you: Why is anybody not an atheist? Everyone starts out being an atheist. No one is born with belief in anything. Infants are atheists until they are indoctrinated. I resent anyone pushing their religion on me. I don't push my atheism on anybody else. Live and let live. Not many people practice that when it comes to religion.
-
I've learned... That life is tough, but I'm tougher.
-
Unfortunately, propaganda works.
-
Did you ever notice that people who are good with a computer don't use it for much of anything except being good with a computer? They know all about information technology, but they don't have much interest in the information. I'm the opposite.
-
No one likes the house next door to look worse or a lot better than his own.
-
Person-to-person, most people are honest.
-
It's best to give advice in only two circumstances; when it's requested, and when it's a life threatening situation.
-
If you smile when no one else is around, you really mean it.
-
I don't think the government is out to get me or help someone else get me but it wouldn't surprise me if they were out to sell me something or help someone else sell me something. I mean, why else would the Census Bureau want to know my telephone number?
-
Creativity is a by-product of hard work. If I never have another really new idea, it won't matter.