Anthony Jeselnik Quotes
I think a theater show is a pure version of me doing my material. The theater crowd is a bit more polite, there really aren't hecklers, and there are a lot of people there to see me, and they're excited about the jokes and hanging out with me for a show.
Quotes to Explore
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Anytime you have a tight race and you lose, it's not pleasant.
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The Koran was revealed at a time of great change in the Arab world, the seventh-century shift from a matriarchal nomadic culture to an urban patriarchal system.
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If people think they've found my biggest weakness, let them try to take advantage of it.
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Dealing with the government does not mean you have to give a bribe.
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I dare anybody to look at me and say I'm anorexic. I'm so totally not.
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Generally my songs are just some riffs slung together as an excuse for a guitar solo.
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Oh, I'm quite the impulse buyer. Most of what I buy is stuff for my Jeep, 'cause it breaks down a lot.
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A person standing in front of an audience without enthusiasm for his subject and his actions is disconnected from his spirit.
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A smart phone essentially creates a dossier of your travels, and consumers have no control over who will eventually see that information.
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In Maryland, we have the unfortunate distinction of being the most gerrymandered state in the entire nation.
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I'm still at the beginning of my career. It's all a little new, and I'm still learning as I go.
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Let's face it, us '60s folks had pretty high expectations.
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But even writing the column for the 'Telegraph,' that idea of working to deadlines, which as an actor that's not something you have to do in the same way. It's excited me into wanting to do a bit more.
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So many people love sci-fi, and they're so loyal.
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My best friend is my husband.
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People think that young people don't care about things, but I think they do care; they just aren't super interested in conforming to what older people think are the right way to do things.
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It's a question of whether we're going to go forward into the future, or past to the back.
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A statesman... must wait until he hears the steps of God sounding through events, then leap up and grasp the hem of His garment.
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I don't know a lot of people who achieve what they have really dreamed of as a little girl.
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We must have great respect for these people who also suffer and who want to find their own way of correct living. On the other hand, to create a legal form of a kind of homosexual marriage, in reality, does not help these people.
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I want to go see Somalia because I've never been there, and I feel like I'm missing out. I want to learn that heritage; I want to learn about my culture.
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People might talk more about Real Madrid and Barcelona than about Atletico, but what matters to me is what happens on the pitch. We compete with them year after year. I am not interested about the club's reputation.
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Here's what I can tell the American people: 95 percent of you will get a tax cut. And if you make less than $250,000, less than a quarter-million dollars a year, then you will not see one dime's worth of tax increase.
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I think a theater show is a pure version of me doing my material. The theater crowd is a bit more polite, there really aren't hecklers, and there are a lot of people there to see me, and they're excited about the jokes and hanging out with me for a show.
