Anthony Jeselnik Quotes
I think a theater show is a pure version of me doing my material. The theater crowd is a bit more polite, there really aren't hecklers, and there are a lot of people there to see me, and they're excited about the jokes and hanging out with me for a show.

Quotes to Explore
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Anytime you have a tight race and you lose, it's not pleasant.
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The Koran was revealed at a time of great change in the Arab world, the seventh-century shift from a matriarchal nomadic culture to an urban patriarchal system.
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If people think they've found my biggest weakness, let them try to take advantage of it.
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Dealing with the government does not mean you have to give a bribe.
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I dare anybody to look at me and say I'm anorexic. I'm so totally not.
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Generally my songs are just some riffs slung together as an excuse for a guitar solo.
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Oh, I'm quite the impulse buyer. Most of what I buy is stuff for my Jeep, 'cause it breaks down a lot.
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A person standing in front of an audience without enthusiasm for his subject and his actions is disconnected from his spirit.
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A smart phone essentially creates a dossier of your travels, and consumers have no control over who will eventually see that information.
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In Maryland, we have the unfortunate distinction of being the most gerrymandered state in the entire nation.
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I'm still at the beginning of my career. It's all a little new, and I'm still learning as I go.
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Let's face it, us '60s folks had pretty high expectations.
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But even writing the column for the 'Telegraph,' that idea of working to deadlines, which as an actor that's not something you have to do in the same way. It's excited me into wanting to do a bit more.
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So many people love sci-fi, and they're so loyal.
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My best friend is my husband.
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People think that young people don't care about things, but I think they do care; they just aren't super interested in conforming to what older people think are the right way to do things.
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It's a question of whether we're going to go forward into the future, or past to the back.
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To assume all the powers is not good for anybody. Power corrupts and absolute power corrupts absolutely. All those experiments have a bad ending.
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A bad or mediocre meal is more than just an unpleasant taste, it is an unnecessary negation of one of life's pleasures - a wasted chance to refine our palates, learn about the world, and share a rewarding experience.
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Language does not make one an elite.
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When I'm not acting, I try to be normal, play golf, play hockey. It's funny because you're in this little bubble when you're working - you don't read books, you don't really keep up with the news, you're just living that life.
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I will continue to help the political causes I believe in in any way I can.
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I think a theater show is a pure version of me doing my material. The theater crowd is a bit more polite, there really aren't hecklers, and there are a lot of people there to see me, and they're excited about the jokes and hanging out with me for a show.