Artie Lange Quotes
By the time I am Howard's age I hope to be long retired. I don't plan on working that long.
Quotes to Explore
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In Paris, AIDS was dismissed as an American phobia until French people started dying; then everyone said, 'Well, you have to die some way or another.' If Americans were hysterical and pragmatic, the French were fatalistic: depressed but determined to keep the party going.
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I've never considered myself to be a fashionista type of guy.
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In a democracy, allegations will never improve situations. So, I'm against allegations, but I always welcome criticism.
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I personally don't like to rehearse so much. I really sort of trust my instinct.
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Never hire someone who knows less than you do about what he's hired to do.
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I get a lot of influence from pro wrestling. People are like, 'Oh, it's fake.' But it's not about whether the guy wins or loses, it's about how he entertains you the whole time you're watching.
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Save a boyfriend for a rainy day - and another, in case it doesn't rain.
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I was on 'SVU' for 11 years. I developed a muscle in my brain that could memorize things much more easily than people who don't do it every day. I got used to the language, and some of it got to be repetitive language, so you build your vocabulary.
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You might think the thinner version of yourself is going to be the most positive or confident, but that's not how it is for me. When I'm over 200 pounds, that's when I'm the most confident version of myself.
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I'm not a big fan of doing what my mother wants me to do, like any daughter.
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I like to go out and write. So I'll often go to a Starbucks or a local coffee bar, and I'll sit there and I'll write. I can write pretty much anywhere.
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I want to show people that there's a side of myself other than just the outrageous comedian.
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Let life happen to you. Believe me: life is in the right, always.
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I'm always shocked when I see myself because I don't recognize myself.
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If people don't find what you are doing threatening, then it is probably not very important.
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A guitar riff played on a piano doesn't come close to the purity of it being played on a guitar but I faked it enough to get by.
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I am a great believer that a captain is as good as his team.
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Writing is only the frosting on my cake. I'm whole without it.
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Juvenile stuff has always made me laugh. It's what I know.
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There is a definite loneliness in the game. Most people stay away from you since they think they're intruding upon your time. And after the ball game, when it's 11 o'clock and you want to eat dinner some place, the restaurants are closed.
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I am not an expert on time, or on cancer, or on life itself.
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There was a time when you were not. There never will be a time when you will not be.
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By the time I am Howard's age I hope to be long retired. I don't plan on working that long.
