Maria Bamford Quotes
Quotes to Explore
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I simply can't do one-word message replies: Yes. Ok. No. Sure. Cool. None of these are options for me. I must write something extra. Something personal. I put kisses and emoticons. Emoticons, by the way, are my very best friends. They have removed all the pressure of thinking up something personal to say.
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The talent curve in game-making is going straight up to Heaven.
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In high school, my goal was to be a writer for SNL, then I got into the acting.
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Romance is a bird that will not sing in every bush, and love-affairs, however devoted the sentiments that inspire them, are often so business-like in the prudence with which they are conducted, that romance is reduced to a mere croaking or a disgusted silence.
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Unless and until you inspire the people, you will not get results. Imposition will never give you the results. Inspiration will always give you the results.
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I've still got that little freedom part of me that wants to have a car that looks really sexy.
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If months were marked by colors, November in New England would be colored gray.
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I don't know how often I can discuss one incident in my entire life, but I'll continue to do that.
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When I feel like my body is exhausted, I focus on making my fifth Olympic team so I can push through it.
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I always try to be true to who I am and just be myself.
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I don't think I could have a genuine relationship with someone who didn't love to travel and appreciate new foods. Traveling is a big part of my life, and I want to share that with the people close to me.
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I can use most of the tools that every American teenager can master. Maybe not all of them.
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Please write music like Wagner, only louder.
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You know what they say about Chicago. If you don't like the weather, wait fifteen minutes.
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Is it a recent occurrence that women have tried to control when and if they reproduced? Absolutely not. By 2000 B.C., there was worldwide use of herbal potions to prevent pregnancy. Condoms were made from animal bladders.
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You punch me, I punch back. I do not believe it's good for one's self-respect to be a punching bag.
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I did 'Formula 51' because I got to run around Liverpool in a kilt, with golf clubs.
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No matter how irrelevant social class now is, even the most eager egalitarian must be quietly proud that the posh English rose is still an industry standard for peerlessly sophisticated beauty.
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I think they have this impression that I'm this miserable cow who doesn't smile. But I'm actually quite the opposite ... I'm going to try and smile more for America
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Ah've never felt anything about countries, other than total disgust. They should fuckin abolish the lot of them. Kill every fuckin parasite politician that ever mouthed lies and fascist platitudes in a shell-suit and a smarmy smile.
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Each high point in the history of human civilisation has taken place where the conditions were ripe and has borrowed and built on the achievements of other cultures whose golden age may have passed.
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If changing our world is playing God, it is just one more way in which God made us in His image.
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S-s-sure I'll join your cult. nervous smile
