Maria Bamford Quotes
when the bank calls: 'Chase Bank, I'm self-employed, how long do you want to stay on the phone?'

Quotes to Explore
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I enjoy pushing my characters to the limit. No matter how far out there I go, I look for things that make the characters human.
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Golf... is the infallible test. The man who can go into a patch of rough alone, with the knowledge that only God is watching him, and play his ball where it lies, is the man who will serve you faithfully and well.
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My short stories have always pushed twenty pages. That's no length for a short story to be. You either do them short like Carver or you stop trying.
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We're dealing with sophisticated customers. What's most important to these women is individuality. I have to create things she'll want to wear, no matter who she is.
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I remember many a time, going into someplace like Wrigley Field - where you could cut the humidity with a knife - and playing a doubleheader. I loved to play the game. It didn't matter if it was a doubleheader, or a single game, or a day game after a night game. I wanted to play.
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Only when the sense of the pain of others begins does man begin.
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I just started making Bloody Marys. I always thought they looked gross, then I tasted one. There's an art to it, from the Tabasco to the Worcestershire.
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I've always been about how will digital be transforming established businesses, and that's what I've done.
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If a company knows it may have to pay a large amount of money if it poses an unreasonable threat to others, it will have a strong incentive to act better.
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Born in 1936, I experienced the Second World War as a child in the city of Gelsenkirchen-Buer. This area was heavily bombed, but fortunately, all members of my family survived the war and post-war period.
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Sarcasm helps me overcome the harshness of the reality we live, eases the pain of scars and makes people smile.
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The Tao teaches us not to intervene and interfere. The things we love we have to learn to leave alone. And the people we love we have to learn to let them be.
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I was brought up in the shadow of the Holocaust. My mother lost most of her family, and I didn't realize how much the guilt of survivorship weighed on her until I was an adult.
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The problem in Afghanistan is really not so much land as water. It's a dry country with ample amounts of water running through it, but not to good enough effect.
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In recent years, the government has lost more than five million fingerprints from government employees. They have lost hundreds of millions of credit numbers from financial institutions. This problem is happening more and more and more. And the only way we can protect ourselves is to make phones more and more secure.
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There are some people who, if they don't already know, you can't tell 'em.
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I know the government needs to ensure economic growth... we just hope it takes care of the environment, too.
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I think the worst thing that can happen to a good actor is fame.
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Music is really powerful. It's a universal language that connects everyone.
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I've always had quite long canines. It's a very strange thing. My parents don't have them.
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The story of Rod Stewart, the story of Carlos Santana is so inspiring to young musicians because it shows in this trendy business how long a career can last. It shows how you can soar back, regardless of age.
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There's still a tremendous amount of homophobia out there in the world, but it is what it is. I am who I am, and the people in my life are who they are, and they love us, hate us, for whatever reason. It is what it is.
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Once the church is ready to associate with instituted power it is obliged to associate with all and sundry forms of the state. The scandal is that each time the church seeks to justify both its adaptation and the existing power. It continues to legitimize the state and to be an instrument of its propaganda.
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when the bank calls: 'Chase Bank, I'm self-employed, how long do you want to stay on the phone?'