Bennett Cerf Quotes
Quotes to Explore
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If in my twenties I'd gotten one of the two-dozen roles that I did screen tests for and almost got, I think I would have become bored with the awards circuit, the whole hype machine.
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Don't go into any store that features shopping bags that can stand on their own accord in the middle of a table. This sort of shopping bag denotes prices that will start chipping into your children's college education fund. Avoid it.
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I love playing live, I don't like studios all that much. I need the reaction of the audience.
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Today's designers don't care if fashion has no relationship to human anatomy.
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I try to talk about policy issues intelligently, I try very hard to avoid thought bubbles. I make sure my speeches are well researched and footnoted. I make sure I am not talking through my hat.
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I mean, sometimes when you do a show or a campaign with a designer, you get along with them really well and you become friends. And then, sometimes, people are just a bit... weird.
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I think it's always easy to be sympathetic to parts of the government in detail; in their concrete manifestations. Because obviously, we don't have government for no reason.
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He was just trying to tease me - I knew that later - but he said he'd have to leave because it wasn't fair to have anyone in the room who was going to make fun of what he had to say. He had a good sense of humor, really.
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You have to really prove yourself to young people, and if your answer is clear and consistent and loving - even if it's angry and disappointed - what's important is that you're being real and honest and not going anywhere.
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I am going to keep having fun every day I have left, because there is no other way of life. You just have to decide whether you are a Tigger or an Eeyore.
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In writing a series of stories about the same characters, plan the whole series in advance in some detail, to avoid contradictions and inconsistencies.
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More and more, we're used to taking things in through the eyes rather than through the ears, and opera is more of a spectacle.
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When I was a child, I did always feel that people were hiding things, and that they weren't expressing their true feelings. When adults are too complicated, and cover their emotions with layers of well-intentioned subterfuge, the child isn't seeing reality clearly enough and gets upset.
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It is easier for a man to be loyal to his club than to his planet; the bylaws are shorter, and he is personally acquainted with the other members.
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The region west of the Mississippi continued in the popular mind to be a strange land for which the reports of explorers and travellers did the work of fiction, and Cooper's Prairie had few followers.
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Yesterday is a cancelled check. Today is cash on the line. Tomorrow is a promissory note.
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Jokes that are gratuitously offensive are synonymous with bad writing to me. I'm offended as a writer first and as a person second.
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More is asked of you on stage. It's no way to make a living. But it's like a bullfight. You find out who can do it and who can't.
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No humorist is under any obligation to provide answers and probably if you were to delve into the literary history of humour it's probably all about not providing answers because the humorist essentially says: this is the way things are.
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Sometimes I envy people who can be only half crazy, with one foot in the passion and one foot in the real world. But that's not me. I dive into the total crazy experience. That's the only way to travel.
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It was only when I moved to New York that I realized tall is good.
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With a 3D printer, you could build your own car, one part at a time. When you were finished, you'd have an automobile that is extremely lightweight because it is made of plastic, which is good because you'd need to carry it because it is made of plastic.
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There is nothing important except people. A person is defined solely by the extent of his influence over other people, by the sphere of his interrelationships; and morality is an utterly meaningless term unless defined as the good one does to others, the fulfilling of one’s function in the sociopolitical whole.
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Good manners: The noise you don't make when you're eating soup.