Golf Quotes
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The difference between men and women seems to be this: I can argue with my promoter downstairs, accuse him of ripping me off, and 20 minutes later we'll be playing golf together. With a lady, the same argument can go on for, like, years.
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I don't think much about my physical body going off into the long, green fairways of Heaven to play golf.
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I've seen the bottom and I know the difference between good golf and bad golf.
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I'm a technician. It's like that in football and the same way in golf. I want to try to find a way that I can swing the club properly. Over the years, it's getting better and better.
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But we do have a golf course near by and I play fairly regularly.
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My golf game is getting real good. Last week, I got through the windmill.
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Women are everywhere. We're letting them play golf and tennis now. It's out of control.
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You can't play enough golf or do any of those other things that fill that kind of excitement that coaching gave me in the big games.
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I play golf with friends sometimes, but there are never friendly games.
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Retirement is an illusion. Not a reward but a mantrap. The bankrupt underside of success. A shortcut to death. Golf courses are too much like cemeteries.
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Be funny on a golf course? Do I kid my best friend's mother about her heart condition?
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I've stayed buddies with my old buddy Jackie Slater. I talk to Jackie Slater. I play golf with Marcus Allen a lot. I play golf with Marshall Faulk a lot. My buddy Craig Young, he lives up in New Mexico. I still talk to a lot of the guys.
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When you look at facing retirement in your mid-30s, and all of a sudden the outlet for that passion and work ethic goes away, you can't just sit back in a rocking chair and be retired at 35. I'm not a good enough golfer to play golf every day.
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When my father realized he was going blind, he took up golf.
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My world is better. Why would I want to waste my time playing golf? I can get up in the morning and be in this whole other world. I love my life.
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A lot of people want to retire; I couldn't. You don't retire in our business. What, play golf and watch television? Oh, please.
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I tend to do golf charity things because it's much safer and you don't get much chance of a broken arm or leg.
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[When asked how someone 6'3" had dared take up golf:] I was too tall to make the chess team in my high school, so I tried golf.
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Years ago we discovered the exact point, the dead center of middle age. It occurs when you are too young to take up golf and too old to rush up to the net.
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You do what you need to if you're serious about playing great golf.
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During the day, I was a doctor. At night, you know, I was a comic. And it was really just to let off some steam. It just became my golf, you know, in many ways. Most doctors have golf as a hobby. Mine was doing comedy.
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I'm not very good in the rain. I don't wear a golf glove.
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Not even Barbra Streisand celebrates herself as tirelessly as golf celebrates itself.
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Confidence, of course is an admirable asset to a golfer, but it should be an unspoken confidence. It is perilous to put it into speech. The gods of golf lie in wait to chasten the presumptious.
