Funeral Quotes
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... the introduction of the doctrine of polygamy was the first time in my life that I desired the grave, and I could hardly get over it for a long time. And when I saw a funeral, I felt to envy the corpse its situation.
Brigham Young
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I've just had some bad news. Tomorrow is the mother in law's funeral. And she's cancelled it.
Les Dawson
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With mirth in funeral and with dirge in marriage.
William Shakespeare
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Michael O'Sullivan was my great friend. But I don't ever remember telling him that. The words that are spoken at a funeral are spoken too late for the man who is dead.
Ian Bannen
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There are songs about abortions, about slashing your arms with razors, about imagining your own funeral in New Orleans, about rock stars cheating on their wives, sex.
Courtney Love
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My mum passing away wasn't funny, but that funeral and what I went through, the things that happened, looking back at it, there were funny moments. You have to be strong enough to look back at it, to sit and assess the situation.
Kevin Hart
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My present post amounts to about 700 thaler, and when there are rather more funerals than usual, the fees rise in proportion; but when a healthy wind blows, they fall accordingly.
Sebastian Bach
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These are the final rites of the funeral of the Cold War, with Russia as a friend and ally and no longer as an enemy.
Jack Straw
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Cheerfulness is the daughter of employment; and I have known a man come home in high spirits from a funeral, merely because he has had the management of it.
William Cornelius Van Horne
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During my grandma's funeral, I looked over once and saw my mom crying, and I felt so bad for her.
Kendra Wilkinson
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A funeral was a great form of entertainment. A wake was a great form of entertainment.
Frank McCourt
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Films, like memories, seem to re-shoot themselves over the years, reflecting our latest needs and obsessions. In many cases they can change completely, and reveal unexpected depths and shallows. Will Four Weddings and a Funeral be seen one day as a vicious social satire? Could Jaws become as tearful and sentimental as Bambi?
J. G. Ballard
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Life's too short for a funeral.
Bill Smith
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Everybody finished the song at different times. At last, only the Weasley twins were left singing along to a very slow funeral march.
Joanne Rowling
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Every now and then I think about my own death, and I think about my own funeral. Every now and then I ask myself, 'What is it that I would want said?' I'd like somebody to mention that day, that Martin Luther King, Jr., tried to give his life serving others. I'd like for somebody to say that day, that Martin Luther King, Jr., tried to love somebody.
Martin Luther King, Jr.
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Immigration along with nonwhite birthrates will make white people a minority totally vulnerable to the political, social, and economic will of blacks, Mexicans, Puerto Ricans, and Orientals. A social upheaval is now beginning to occur that will be the funeral dirge of the America we love. I shudder to contemplate the future under nonwhite occupation; rapes, murders, robberies multiplied a hundred fold, illiteracy such as in Haiti, medicine such as in Mexico, and tyranny such as in Togoland.
David Duke
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I think you should live your life so that the maximum number of people will attend your funeral.
Scott Adams
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What an incitation to hilarity, hearing the word goal while following a funeral procession!
Emil Cioran
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I hope you die.... P.S. If you do die, I'm going to go to the funeral and finger your corpse.
Michael Ian Black
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In the funeral home, I never heard laughter like that in my life. The audience was laughing on the screen, and we were laughing in the home.
Carl Reiner
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I make it a kind of pious rule to go to every funeral to which I am invited, both as I wish to pay a proper respect to the dead, unless their characters have been bad, and as I would wish to have the funeral of my own near relations or of myself well attended.
James Boswell
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I don't have any set things that I'm looking for, like, 'I've done this now I want to do this,' kind of thing. Just read the material, if it appeals, if it makes me laugh: like, 'Death at a Funeral' made me laugh out loud.
Alan Tudyk
