Chelsea Handler Quotes
I was broke from 19 to 26, borrowing money from my parents or my brothers or sisters every week to pay the bills.

Quotes to Explore
-
I came up from growing up with a lot of Catholic guilt, a lot of punk rock, hipster guilt in the later years where I think people have thrown a lot of things on me. Where I always felt like I'm not supposed to tell the horn section what to play or I don't want to come off egotistical.
-
I just got to hear every note. After I left Birdland, I started working at the Jazz Gallery. In the end, I still couldn't play, but I knew how to listen. I was probably the world's best listener.
-
The action carries a sense of incompleteness and frustration, but not of guilt. Victorious living does not mean perfect living in the sense of living without flaw, but it does mean adequate living, and that can be consistent with many mistakes.
-
I don't know half of you half as well as I should like; and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.
-
I'm just there to do interviews and stuff, because we have about 40 media people there, so it's a very, very busy week. But that's the only time. I did marry, I think on one show, about 25 couples in Acapulco Bay once, but that was all just for kicks.
-
You cannot be in your offices every day doing nothing... and at the end of the day you expect to be paid.
-
I wish I could say it's easy, but honestly, to get ready for a big championship is not as easy as it seems.
-
Whether it was Little League or playing with your brothers or sisters, that was always a problem. If I would lose - because I very rarely lost - then everything would go crazy.
-
The girl-next-door image is a sort of joke; for years, I couldn't get any roles other than as somebody dark.
-
I don't want to dig in the truth all of the time. Let me dream.
-
I'm guilty of eating Magnum bars before I go to sleep at night.
-
Albums are like diaries. You go through phases, technically and emotionally, and they reflect the state that you're in at the time.
-
I will always be an actress. I couldn't see myself without acting. But I'd love to direct and keep writing. I don't think one has to be in place of the other.
-
The most valuable thing you can make is a mistake - you can't learn anything from being perfect.
-
Everything I say is true.
-
I love accents. It's a great way to separate yourself when playing a role.
-
Acting has always existed alongside my normal life. It's been a case of learning on the job. I've worked in so many styles, with so many people, so I've picked bits up from everyone and everything.
-
Women are the only 'oppressed' group that is able to buy most of the $10 billion worth of cosmetics each year; the only oppressed group that spends more on high fashion, brand-name clothing than its oppressors; the only oppressed group that watches more TV.
-
It's just impossible to ignore the activists in your party. These are the people who stuff the envelopes, and walk the precincts, and make the telephone calls, and do all the so-called grunt work that brings about a successful campaign.
-
It's perhaps fitting that I write this introduction in jail.
-
There's no doubt that on the issue of abortion, oftentimes it's very difficult to split the difference, although we can agree on the notion that none of us are pro-abortion and all of us would like to see a reduction in unwanted pregnancies, for example, and we could focus on those issues.
-
What few realize is the unique role the North Country of New York played in advancing women's rights in the United States.
-
Primitivism has become the vulgar cliche of much modern art and speculation. (p. 77)
-
I was broke from 19 to 26, borrowing money from my parents or my brothers or sisters every week to pay the bills.