Chelsea Handler Quotes

I try to make fun of everyone as often as possible, especially minorities.

Chelsea Handler

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Quotes to Explore

• My grandfather milked several cows twice a day and supplied the neighbours with dairy products. He liked to go visiting around the county on Saturdays, and he also enjoyed the neighbours when they came by once a week with their empty milk jars. He walked them out to their cars and hung over the driver's side window until they drove off.

  

  Kary Mullis
  • Day
  • Week
  • Grandfather

• To steal a term from one of my Twitter followers, 'Deathlok' is the 'anti-villain.' He's on the side of the bad guys, but he obviously doesn't want to be there.

  

  J. August Richards
  • Bad
  • Want
  • Twitter

• I still find it strange, I suppose, when I say to someone, 'Can you just pass me my leg?' But I don't ever think about my disability.

  

  Oscar Pistorius
  • Me
  • Strange
  • Disability

• That a majority of the Abolitionists in this place would patronize a free labor store, in preference to others, I do not doubt; but we do not muster money in Cincinnati.

  

  Gamaliel Bailey
  • Money
  • Free
  • Doubt

• Having a book censored means something. It means you have deeply offended one or more people who felt they needed to protect unsuspecting readers from your inflammatory words, thoughts, and images.

  

  Felice Picano
  • People
  • Book
  • Words

• I have always had a sense of curiosity and aspiration.

  

  Waris Ahluwalia
  • Always
  • Sense
  • Curiosity

• The American people know something is wrong as far as energy is concerned. They don't think they are being told the truth.

  

  T. Boone Pickens
  • People
  • Truth
  • American

• The kind of classic pose of a female model is to look kind of sexy and a bit annoyed.

  

  Caitlin Moran
  • Kind
  • Model
  • Look

• Smelling a crayon takes you right back to childhood. When I need to go back in time, I put it under my nose and take another hit.

  

  Randy Pausch
  • Time
  • Childhood
  • Nose

• The historian is a prophet looking backward.

  

  Karl Wilhelm Friedrich Schlegel
  • Looking
  • Prophet
  • Backward

• I do read some of the scripts from America and, even though the themes or subject of the film is very interesting, and some of the scenes are very interesting, there is a tendency that they have to explain everything. There will be no dilemma.

  

  Mads Mikkelsen
  • America
  • Interesting
  • Film

• Basketball paid for four years of my education, and I am so proud of that.

  

  Ramon Rodriguez
  • Education
  • Proud
  • Basketball

• Men always do leave off really thinking, when the last bit of wild animal dies in them.

  

  D. H. Lawrence
  • Men
  • Thinking
  • Animal

• The Alanis Morissette tour, everybody thinks that was all sitting around, lighting candles and talking intelligently about synergy and big words. That band was so gnarly. We were such scumbags. Alanis had no idea. We were like Van Halen.

  

  Taylor Hawkins Foo Fighters
  • Words
  • Band
  • Like

• I am very career minded, and I think my personality is more suited to America. I am a working mother.

  

  Victoria Beckham Spice Girls
  • America
  • Mother
  • Career

• I consider a CD or a comedy collection as a record of what I've been doing, and I try to wrap it up and start new material.

  

  Kate Clinton
  • Up
  • Comedy
  • Doing

• By plucking her petals, you do not gather the beauty of the flower.

  

  Rabindranath Tagore
  • Beauty
  • Flower
  • Gardening

• I think television scripts have become really intriguing and well-done. And writers have stopped drawing any actual line between film and television they used to never cross.

  

  Natalie Zea
  • Done
  • Think
  • Television

• I am totally a fringe candidate, and so is Bill Weld: you know, two Republican governors serving in heavily blue states, outspoken, small government guys, outspoken on the social liberal side. We're fringe, totally. We're fringe.

  

  Gary Johnson
  • Government
  • Republican
  • Candidate

• On '24,' you don't have time to emote and deal with stuff, because stuff just keeps happening. Every other minute, there's something crazy that's happening that's threatening this country.

  

  Corey Hawkins
  • Time
  • Country
  • Crazy

• Think on your toes, use what's around you, and come up with something organic and fun.

  

  Zac Efron
  • Up
  • Fun
  • Think

• A ball bat is a wondrous weapon.

  

  Ty Cobb

• I was paid to be cheeky and people clapped me for it.

  

  George Cole
  • People

• I try to make fun of everyone as often as possible, especially minorities.

  

  Chelsea Handler
  • Fun