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I don't think there's hardly a comic out there that does clean material all the way around. There's a couple of guys that are clean, but I'm not one of them.
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I like to think of my house as nothing more than a glorified console for my television; the ultimate stereo cabinet.
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I could still eat a cheeseburger if I wanted to. I just can't have them every day.
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I'm not a good lover, but at least I'm fast.
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When I'm working, I'm going to avoid all media. No newspapers, no magazines, no movies, no radio, no TV. I'm just going to do creative work.
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I don't have a Bluetooth thing on my ear. That bugs me.
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After all, game shows are not like working in a coal mine.
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If I wasn't a comic or TV star, I really wanted to be a photojournalist.
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When the show's in production, we work for three weeks at a time and then take a week off.
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Exercise is the main thing that helped me lose weight.
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One day I was running around playing with my son Connor when afterwards I was sweating, tired and out of breath. I was embarrassed that something as enjoyable as playing with my son was so tough for me to do. Immediately I started an extensive diet and exercise plan. It completely changed my life and helped cure my Type-2 diabetes.
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I was just sick of being fat, you know? You get sick of it. It just really, it's a tiring lifestyle to have.
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The people of Cleveland hate soccer. But it's my favourite thing and I follow the U.S. men's national team around when they play whenever I can.
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When I play poker, I don't like losing the pot.
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Every election I have to hold my nose to vote.
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I love Las Vegas. I like that Las Vegas has everything. Everything and anything you want to do, you can do in Las Vegas.
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I never thought I was a libertarian until I picked up Reason magazine and realized I agree with everything they had printed.
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What also helps our show is that we never take ourselves seriously.
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Nevada's one of the most conservative states in the Union, but you can do what you want in Vegas and nobody judges you.
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The Marines was a fresh start - that is why they shave your head. I wish they would let you change your name.
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The TV season is a year-long thing now, and the networks are starting to look at it that way, thanks to cable, satellites, and competition.
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I don't do one show and wish I was doing something else.
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Funniest thing happened though, you wouldn't believe it, ha, the mannequins came to life. I went insane.
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Oh, you hate your job? Why didn't you say so? There's a support group for that. It's called everybody, and they meet at the bar.