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But I believe that there are marriages where you can have your pool table and she can have her scrapbooking room or garden or whatever it is. But when everyone has what they want, it's not funny. There's no conflict.
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I think we love watching people that are flawed because we're all flawed.
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Broadway was without doubt the hardest I ever worked in my life and the highest highs I've ever had as an actor. The unadulterated fear was on a level that was hard to explain.
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I'm totally, totally into old Vegas.
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Men and women are like cats and dogs. I've learned more about myself from women. My comedy is based on this.
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I'm out about my misogyny. Most men are misogynists, and most women are feminists. I work with a lot of women. They have their finger on the pulse of things. But women do things to other women that men would never do to other men.
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You take away all the other luxuries in life, and if you can make someone smile and laugh, you have given the most special gift: happiness.
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Standup is really the only thing in the entertainment business that you do totally alone.
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I am so fascinated and taken by the Golden Knights.
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My whole life, I've been telling jokes.
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I'm the type of guy that feels pressure when I have to order dinner. I'm just that type of guy but that's my fuel. I work well with pressure.
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I come from the world of improv; I love any show or any vehicle that gives me an opportunity to be in the moment.
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It's all I have left in my life, caffeine and a poodle.
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There's not a day that goes by where I don't think, 'Oh, I'm a lucky pup.'
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I don't think we're politically correct when we're private. I don't know what 'politically correct' means.
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People who are bipolar, they kind of latch onto things that are fanatical sometimes.
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As stated earlier, I am a pessimistic optimist, or what I like to call a 'pissed-omist.' This is a person who has lived long enough to know not to expect much from most people or life in general, but still allows him- or herself the hope that somewhere under all the horseshit there may possibly be a pony.
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I'm not big on game shows.
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I love performing, and it's important that I do it at my own club, absolutely. It's good for me. It's good for business.
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I've always wanted to play a coach in a movie, just to be the captain of anything in the pirate ship of my bathtub.
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Sports were never my thing.
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I think as any artist you always want to grow; you always want to get better.
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There's a black man inside of me just trying to make bail.
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We don't take care of our teachers and our cops and our firemen. They should be at the top of our list.