Mallory Ortberg Quotes

Anything where I get to write a lot of jokes and have a lot of creative control - that's all I want.

Mallory Ortberg

• Want
• Control
• Creative

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Quotes to Explore

• Ozzy has dyslexia.

  

  Zakk Wylde Black Label Society
  • Dyslexia
  • Ozzy

• I attended the bedside of a friend who was dying in a Dublin hospital. She lived her last hours in a public ward with a television blaring out a football match, all but drowning our final conversation.

  

  Gabriel Byrne
  • Friend
  • Football
  • Dying

• A lot of my work involves instilling objects with the power of touch - a transference of soul, spirit, energy through actions.

  

  Dan Colen
  • Work
  • Power
  • Soul

• I love to smell like roses, literally all day!

  

  Rachel Roy
  • Like
  • Smell
  • Roses

• There can be no great courage where there is no confidence or assurance, and half the battle is in the conviction that we can do what we undertake.

  

  Orison Swett Marden
  • Great
  • Confidence
  • Courage

• Writing for children hadn't occurred to me when I was younger, but nine years of teaching in the upper elementary grades had given me a deep appreciation of the gifts and graces that are specific to individuals with 10 or 11 years of experience as human beings.

  

  Zilpha Keatley Snyder
  • Writing
  • Children
  • Experience

• The horror genre is not my favorite. I think it's fun, there's a great place for it and I get a kick out of it, but some stuff I'm too old for. You can't just take 10 guys and stick them in a cabin and off them one at a time - I'm not vested.

  

  Jackie Earle Haley
  • Time
  • Great
  • Fun

• I don't think you get to be pope without making some enemies, like you do when you're president.

  

  Viggo Mortensen
  • Think
  • You
  • President

• After all those years in Asia, I don't have to do promotion anymore. We just release a Jackie Chan movie and - Boom! - people go.

  

  Jackie Chan
  • People
  • Movie
  • Release

• I've always been excited by rotoscoping, the technique used in films like 'Waking Life,' which fuses animation with real-life emotion. It seemed like it was a process ripe for innovation.

  

  Aaron Koblin
  • Life
  • Real
  • Process

• There's a smartphone gait: the slow sidewalk weave that comes from being lost in conversation rather than looking where you're going.

  

  Nancy Gibbs
  • Lost
  • Conversation
  • Slow

• If liberalism is to mean anything at all, it is duty bound to support without hesitation the dissenting individual over the group, the heretic over the orthodox, innovation over stagnation, and free speech over offense.

  

  Maajid Nawaz
  • Free
  • Support
  • Innovation

• A solid family, as they say. They join me on location if they have a chance, but I can also be home three or four months doing nothing, so I probably see my kids more than people who work constantly all year long. If that changes, we'll have to have a family meeting.

  

  Mads Mikkelsen
  • People
  • Work
  • Long

• In my next life, I want to be a housecat. Naps all the time!

  

  Laura Anne Gilman
  • Life
  • Time
  • Want

• I'm a very driven, ambitious, positive person. But I'm a spiritual person as well.

  

  Victoria Beckham Spice Girls
  • Spiritual
  • Positive
  • Driven

• Street artists need to get back to actually doing things on the streets instead of in the galleries where they all seem to be ending up. I hope this term 'street artist' falls from the face of the earth, in my honest opinion.

  

  Barry McGee
  • Up
  • Hope
  • Earth

• Someone once said that you can make the choice between getting old and getting creepy, and I think getting old is the way to go.

  

  Kate Beckinsale
  • Think
  • Choice
  • Old

• It vexes me when they would constrain science by the authority of the Scriptures, and yet do not consider themselves bound to answer reason and experiment.

  

  Galileo Galilei
  • Science
  • Reason
  • Authority

• I have vitamins I intend to take to be a better person. I even have a pillbox for them to remind myself to be healthier. But will I take them? Definitely not.

  

  Lake Bell
  • Myself
  • Better Person

• It's so lovely to know that people who you would never think know about Bollywood, they know about Bollywood.

  

  Nargis Fakhri
  • People
  • Think
  • Know

• I've been watching 'The Cosby Show' and 'Roseanne' a lot right now, and those work so well because they're not, like, jokey comedies; they are coming from real characters. We want our show to be like that. A family show.

  

  Abbi Jacobson
  • Work
  • Real
  • Family

• Film is mostly a visual medium, and so the director has much more control in terms of painting pictures and painting a performance. For theater, the director does everything he can and then says, 'Out you go,' and the actors are in charge of that stage every night.

  

  David Lindsay-Abaire
  • Night
  • Control
  • Painting

• It’s utter sublimation, A feat, this heart’s control Moment to moment To scale all love down To a cupped hand’s size

  

  Edith Tiempo
  • Love
  • Control
  • Sublimation

• Anything where I get to write a lot of jokes and have a lot of creative control - that's all I want.

  

  Mallory Ortberg
  • Want
  • Control
  • Creative