Mallory Ortberg Quotes

Anything where I get to write a lot of jokes and have a lot of creative control - that's all I want.

Mallory Ortberg

• Want
• Control
• Creative

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Quotes to Explore

• Ozzy has dyslexia.

  

  Zakk Wylde Black Label Society
  • Dyslexia
  • Ozzy

• I attended the bedside of a friend who was dying in a Dublin hospital. She lived her last hours in a public ward with a television blaring out a football match, all but drowning our final conversation.

  

  Gabriel Byrne
  • Friend
  • Football
  • Dying

• A lot of my work involves instilling objects with the power of touch - a transference of soul, spirit, energy through actions.

  

  Dan Colen
  • Work
  • Power
  • Soul

• Writing for children hadn't occurred to me when I was younger, but nine years of teaching in the upper elementary grades had given me a deep appreciation of the gifts and graces that are specific to individuals with 10 or 11 years of experience as human beings.

  

  Zilpha Keatley Snyder
  • Writing
  • Children
  • Experience

• The horror genre is not my favorite. I think it's fun, there's a great place for it and I get a kick out of it, but some stuff I'm too old for. You can't just take 10 guys and stick them in a cabin and off them one at a time - I'm not vested.

  

  Jackie Earle Haley
  • Time
  • Great
  • Fun

• After all those years in Asia, I don't have to do promotion anymore. We just release a Jackie Chan movie and - Boom! - people go.

  

  Jackie Chan
  • People
  • Movie
  • Release

• I've always been excited by rotoscoping, the technique used in films like 'Waking Life,' which fuses animation with real-life emotion. It seemed like it was a process ripe for innovation.

  

  Aaron Koblin
  • Life
  • Real
  • Process

• There's a smartphone gait: the slow sidewalk weave that comes from being lost in conversation rather than looking where you're going.

  

  Nancy Gibbs
  • Lost
  • Conversation
  • Slow

• If liberalism is to mean anything at all, it is duty bound to support without hesitation the dissenting individual over the group, the heretic over the orthodox, innovation over stagnation, and free speech over offense.

  

  Maajid Nawaz
  • Free
  • Support
  • Innovation

• A solid family, as they say. They join me on location if they have a chance, but I can also be home three or four months doing nothing, so I probably see my kids more than people who work constantly all year long. If that changes, we'll have to have a family meeting.

  

  Mads Mikkelsen
  • People
  • Work
  • Long

• In my next life, I want to be a housecat. Naps all the time!

  

  Laura Anne Gilman
  • Life
  • Time
  • Want

• Street artists need to get back to actually doing things on the streets instead of in the galleries where they all seem to be ending up. I hope this term 'street artist' falls from the face of the earth, in my honest opinion.

  

  Barry McGee
  • Up
  • Hope
  • Earth

• Someone once said that you can make the choice between getting old and getting creepy, and I think getting old is the way to go.

  

  Kate Beckinsale
  • Think
  • Choice
  • Old

• It vexes me when they would constrain science by the authority of the Scriptures, and yet do not consider themselves bound to answer reason and experiment.

  

  Galileo Galilei
  • Science
  • Reason
  • Authority

• A lie to me is a dream that might come true.

  

  Malachy McCourt
  • True
  • Dream
  • Me

• I give two hoots about being typecast. It's not in my hands.

  

  Randeep Hooda
  • Hands
  • Two
  • Give

• In TV, you don't know everything. The writers only give you scripts before you shoot the episodes. They keep you on your nerve.

  

  Yasmine Al Masri
  • You
  • Know
  • Everything

• Character development is what I value most as a reader of fiction. If an author can manage to create the sort of characters who feel fully real, who I find myself worrying about while I'm walking through the grocery store aisles a week later, that to me is as close to perfection as it gets.

  

  J. Courtney Sullivan
  • Real
  • Character
  • Myself

• There is hurt that cannot be fixed by band aids or poetrybecause no matter how wide you stretch your fingers, your hands will always be too small to catch all the pain you want to heal. Believe me, I’ve tried.

  

  Sarah Kay
  • Believe
  • Pain
  • Hurt

• I don't like feeling full when I start a game, so that's why I have a bigger meal in morning or four hours before game.

  

  Kelley O'Hara
  • Why
  • Game
  • Feeling

• When the Americans see someone like Steve Jobs or Mark Zuckerberg, who made billions thanks to their talent and determination, the first thing they say to themselves is, 'I want to be like him.' This, in many ways, is the engine that drives Western society: The desire to make it like the winners.

  

  Yair Lapid
  • Want
  • Society
  • Desire

• We're doing a great disservice to our young people because the only protection is abstinence, as condoms have been proven fallible....The federal government should not be telling young people to use condoms....It's also an insult to teenagers, reducing them to the level of a dog that can't control its hormones.

  

  Christine O'Donnell
  • People
  • Great
  • Control

• The theme for me is love and the lack of it. We all want that and we don't know how to get it, and everything we do is some kind of attempt to capture it for ourselves.

  

  Ryan Gosling
  • Want
  • Kind
  • Capture

• Anything where I get to write a lot of jokes and have a lot of creative control - that's all I want.

  

  Mallory Ortberg
  • Want
  • Control
  • Creative