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'There's nothing wrong with the word conspiracy. It just means 'to breathe together'.'
Janeane Garofalo
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I guess I just prefer to see the dark side of things. The glass is always half-empty. And cracked. And I just cut my lip on it. And chipped a tooth.
Janeane Garofalo
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Tina Fey is part of a generation of women who have changed the face of comedy at 'Second City,' 'SNL,' in sitcoms and in film.
Janeane Garofalo
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'It sounds like I'm always being facetious. That's why I never get voice over work. 'You sound like you hate the product.' '
Janeane Garofalo
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If you aren't overly effusive or really nicey-nice with the press, you get a reputation for being outspoken or difficult.
Janeane Garofalo
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The term 'celebrity' makes my skin crawl.
Janeane Garofalo
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When Communist U.S.S.R. was a superpower, the world was better off. The right-wing media is trying to marginalize the peace movement.
Janeane Garofalo
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Is being an idiot like being high all the time?
Janeane Garofalo
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Let's be very honest about what this is about. It's not about bashing Democrats, it's not about taxes, they have no idea what the Boston tea party was about, they don't know their history at all. This is about hating a black man in the White House. This is racism straight up.
Janeane Garofalo
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I do not enjoy when people don't like me.
Janeane Garofalo
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You just need an opportunity and then you yourself have to do a good job, and then you hope that people go, 'Oh yeah, I forgot about her.'
Janeane Garofalo
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When I see the American flag, I go, 'Oh my God, you're insulting me.'
Janeane Garofalo
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Men are allowed to age. Men are allowed to gain weight. Men are allowed to be quirky looking.
Janeane Garofalo
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German accents and Hassidic accents aren't that romantic. They're more harsh. Although Hebrew, when spoken by certain people, sounds beautiful. There's this beautiful woman I know who speaks Hebrew, and when she speaks, it's so attractive. Maybe it's who's speaking it.
Janeane Garofalo
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Iraq is a manufactured conflict for the sake of geopolitical dominance in the area.
Janeane Garofalo
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I don't think Hollywood was trying to do anything with me. In fact, they lost interest pretty quick.
Janeane Garofalo
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I have yet to meet very many people in the press who are really, truly interested in writing a good story or getting at the truth. Most press people, when they come into an article, have an angle that they want already, so they need points to support that angle, whatever the angle may be.
Janeane Garofalo
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I'm a sucker for any guy with an accent with any kind.
Janeane Garofalo
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For my stand-up, I always have my notebook with me and if something strikes me, I'll write it down.
Janeane Garofalo
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I am not a person that is particularly tethered to fashion, which I think is obvious to anyone who's seen me.
Janeane Garofalo
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I love a nice cooking show. It's as aesthetically pleasing as any other thing that tempts the senses, I suppose.
Janeane Garofalo
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To me, there is no greater act of courage than being the one who kisses first.
Janeane Garofalo
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Boy, does that give you street cred for years after, if you tell people you were on 'The Larry Sanders Show!'
Janeane Garofalo
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'No no no! Don't clap! No no no, you make me seem like I'm like a prophet or something and I'm so not!'
Janeane Garofalo
