Penn Jillette Quotes

A joke is a way to say, 'I'm going to do something funny now. If I don't get a laugh at the end, I'm a failure.'

Penn Jillette

• Funny
• Failure

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Quotes to Explore

• I don't think Joe Louis could take the punches today fighting in this era.

  

  Larry Holmes
  • Think
  • Today
  • Fighting

• I do not deal with threats and ultimatums.

  

  Yair Lapid
  • Deal
  • Threats
  • Ultimatums

• When I was doing all this acting stuff, all these kids, like, assumed, 'Oh, my God, you're on TV, and you probably have a lot of money.' And I was living in a garage.

  

  Becky G
  • God
  • Money
  • Kids

• For me to go casual is not to go simple. To me, it is to be able to bring back the art of tradition and the soul of French food and my interpretation of that.

  

  Daniel Boulud
  • Art
  • Soul
  • Food

• I mean there are many people who have endorsed me that I agree with on some things and not others.

  

  Carly Fiorina
  • People
  • Mean
  • Things

• The shoe that fits one person pinches another; there is no recipe for living that suits all cases.

  

  Carl Jung
  • Life
  • Suits
  • Shoe

• If you're a writer, write. You just keep writing. And if you're a filmmaker, you keep doing what you can to keep telling your stories; you don't stay on the one. Keep moving forward and doing what you can to tell whatever story you can tell, be it via writing, be it via filming it.

  

  Dana Brunetti
  • Writing
  • Moving
  • Moving Forward

• That's one of the things I miss most about Australia - the countryside.

  

  Yvonne Strahovski
  • Most
  • Australia
  • Countryside

• He that climbs the tall tree has won right to the fruit, He that leaps the wide gulf should prevail in his suit.

  

  Walter Scott
  • Tree
  • Fruit
  • Tall

• My secret to all casting, and specifically kids, is cast good human beings.

  

  M. Night Shyamalan
  • Good
  • Kids
  • Human

• I know the power obedience has of making things easy which seem impossible.

  

  Saint Teresa of Avila
  • Power
  • Easy
  • Impossible

• I like a twisted sense of humour. On 'A History of Violence,' David Cronenberg and I would be doing the grimmest scenes and laugh a lot.

  

  Viggo Mortensen
  • History
  • Violence
  • Laugh

• It's funny to think that when you get done with an acting job, you're considered unemployed. There are definitely times when those checks don't last forever. I went to college at a private school, and I racked up quite a bit of debt. I was very slow to pay them back.

  

  Rami Malek
  • Up
  • School
  • Done

• When I was a kid just starting out on the radio, I would always watch people. And I'd see the interest they'd have in trying to get a photo with an artist or get a ticket stub signed. I guess, to me, that's the ultimate thing – to know that what you've done is important enough to other people that they want to take a picture with you.

  

  Eddie Trunk
  • People
  • Important
  • Artist

• I'm reading today because of 'Encyclopedia Brown.'

  

  Octavia Spencer
  • Today
  • Reading
  • Brown

• What people can survive and what they don't survive is shocking to me. Someone can go to Iraq and be blown to bits and survive. Someone can trip and fall on the street and they die – that's that.

  

  Laura Linney
  • People
  • Me
  • Die

• Each great athlete must some day bow to that perennial old champion, Father Time, even as I, for Time eventually wins.

  

  Major Taylor
  • Time
  • Great
  • Father

• Women are capable of doing so many things these days, physically, emotionally, within relationships and career. There are so many things that women have evolved into and I feel really proud about where women are right now.

  

  Cameron Diaz
  • Women
  • Career
  • Proud

• I do believe that when you know better, you do better. You know what was wrong about the last relationship, and hopefully you will do better the next time.

  

  Elisha Cuthbert
  • Time
  • Believe
  • Relationship

• What you have is Mitt Romney running around the country saying 'Well, you know, my wife tells me that what women really care about are economic issues, and when I listen to my wife, that's what I'm hearing.' Guess what? His wife has actually never worked a day in her life.

  

  Barack Obama
  • Life
  • Women
  • Country

• I know, as an overachiever straight-A student in school, I always responded to smart, strong, women represented on screen.

  

  Allison Scagliotti
  • Women
  • School
  • Strong

• The thing about For Better or Worse is the only thing that made me an okay director for that is that I have a sense of humor, and it was supposed to be funny.

  

  Jason Alexander
  • Funny

• A joke is a way to say, 'I'm going to do something funny now. If I don't get a laugh at the end, I'm a failure.'

  

  Penn Jillette
  • Funny
  • Failure