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I intend to do the Penn & Teller show until they pry my cheesy magic wand from my cold dead fingers.
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For better or worse, in the 21st century, reality shows are the variety show.
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You should think about the world and feel about your heart.
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Barack Obama is way smarter than Bush - so way, way smarter than me. Obama is way more charismatic than me.
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Showbiz is just there to give people something to talk about.
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We need a president who realizes that there's no government business in show business.
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I think one of the things about Donald Trump that's interesting is he lives in a rarified atmosphere where it's possible that he doesn't get enough feedback, enough people rolling their eyes at him. It's a danger more in show business than it is with wealth.
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Poker would have never gotten on TV when we only had three networks.
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I believe the fast track to atheism is reading the Bible. I've read it three times all the way through. It's a big part of our culture, a big part of our history. I don't just read things I agree with.
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I like things matching. I have an upright bass, a drum kit and a grand piano that's the same color. I tend to overthink things.
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I'm very happy being big and effeminate.
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I don't want anyone as president who promises to take care of me. I may be stupid, but I want a chance to try to be a grown-up and take care of my family.
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Democracy without respect for individual rights sucks. It's just ganging up against the weird kid, and I'm always the weird kid.
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Everybody is designing magic iPhone apps that do things that are really, really beautiful, but a really important thing about magic is that the gimmick has to be ugly.
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I don't want people who are in poverty, in pain, or suffering, to suffer because it's for their own good and they can pull themselves up by their bootstraps. I want to help them. I want us all to help them.
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I love the feeling of shredded wheat. I love healthy bird food with a fun-to-eat feel. Then you spray them with sugar, and I'm there.
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Building a professional relationship on respect as opposed to affection is a very good idea. Running your art projects the way you'd run a dry-cleaning business is also a really good idea. You shouldn't go into work like you're going on a date, like you're hanging out with friends.
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I read a lot of books to my children, and they all seem really good. I think people have gotten really good at children's books.
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The fact is that violence gives you a rush.
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If you want to turn out an atheist child, unconditional love constantly is a good way to do it.
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You have to be careful as a libertarian because you can sound very Republican.
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You have two choices with Obama. You either believe that he is a man of Christ... or you think he's a liar. And I'm surprised by the number of atheist free thinkers that support Obama, and their argument is essentially, 'He's lying about being religious 'cause you have to do that to get elected.' It's a horrible reason to like somebody.
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My mom, if you asked her if she was interested in whether or not people gambled, would say no.
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The only secret of magic is that I'm willing to work harder on it than you think it's worth.
Penn Jillette