Penn Jillette Quotes
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Trey Parker did 'Book of Mormon.' It's the best Broadway show I've ever seen. He does 'South Park.' It's wonderful.
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A lot of older parents worry about being older parents. I hear people say, 'I don't want to be too old to play baseball with my son.' They worry that their kids will be embarrassed by their parents' age.
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I love the feeling of shredded wheat. I love healthy bird food with a fun-to-eat feel. Then you spray them with sugar, and I'm there.
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We know what racist people look like. They don't deny it. They just don't!
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I don't want anyone as president who promises to take care of me. I may be stupid, but I want a chance to try to be a grown-up and take care of my family.
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Everybody is designing magic iPhone apps that do things that are really, really beautiful, but a really important thing about magic is that the gimmick has to be ugly.
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I'm totally clean and sober my whole life.
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I don't want people who are in poverty, in pain, or suffering, to suffer because it's for their own good and they can pull themselves up by their bootstraps. I want to help them. I want us all to help them.
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Democracy without respect for individual rights sucks. It's just ganging up against the weird kid, and I'm always the weird kid.
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I believe that there is no God. I'm beyond atheism. Atheism is not believing in God. Not believing in God is easy - you can't prove a negative, so there's no work to do
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You have two choices with Obama. You either believe that he is a man of Christ... or you think he's a liar. And I'm surprised by the number of atheist free thinkers that support Obama, and their argument is essentially, 'He's lying about being religious 'cause you have to do that to get elected.' It's a horrible reason to like somebody.
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Whereas you have someone like Houdini, who works really, really hard to get really, really famous, and then has actual intellectual ideas that he puts into the culture that stay there.
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Penn & Teller don't know jack about global warming.
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I have nothing good to say about Donald Trump as president.
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Cheerios bring back memories. I actually don't think I ate them much as a kid, though; maybe it's some sort of Jungian memory, I don't know. But they have so much sugar, it's great.
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The highest ideals are human intelligence, creativity and love. Respect these above all.
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A lot of people, to attack an outspoken atheist, one of the things they'll do is say, 'You are as bad as the fundamentalist Christians.' And my answer is always, 'I hope so.'
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I had e-mail in 1984! I had an e-mail address then, which means that all you could write to was Steve Jobs and Bill Gates. There were three of us, writing to each other.
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One thing you learn doing magic tricks for a living is how close every performance of every magic trick is to disaster. There are no robust magic tricks. They're all hanging from a thread - sometimes literally.
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Bob Saget is the dirtiest comic who's ever lived. Nobody touches him.
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My hair is way, way long. I've hitchhiked across the country a zillion times. I've ridden in every car. I was never a hippie. It takes more than long hair.
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I've never had a drink of alcohol or any drug in my life.
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If you want to turn out an atheist child, unconditional love constantly is a good way to do it.
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Charities are really good. To a certain extent, the ones you pick are arbitrary.