Jennifer Coolidge Quotes
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I was like a waitress that got a job once in a while, and then Stifler's mom happened, and everything changed.
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Short of spending $10,000, there is nothing you can do to your head to hide the fact that you're going bald.
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As a single woman, I reap the benefits of being Stifler's mom.
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I've been many people. I've been the skinny girl. I've been the fat girl. Because I've become a character actress, I sort of fell victim to 'Well, I don't have to look good anymore.'
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With Christopher Guest films, we have a lot of say.
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I think I'm comedy-attractive, but it's never gonna be me and Charlize Theron up there.
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I do shows, stage shows all the time, and I'm so afraid that people are going to recognize themselves, and they never do. They never do. They're always like, 'Oh, that woman was ridiculous,' and yeah, they're talking about themselves.
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When you're on this major English estate, breathing in the English air, and it's untouched, you can feel its presence. It's a whole different feel. It really felt like we were there living it. It didn't feel modern, ever.
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I love Australia, and I especially love those rugby players.
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I was thinking, 'If I go bald, I might do something like Bret Michaels and have it all attached to a handkerchief.'
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I would say 90 percent of the scripts that show up on my door are women who have had lots of plastic surgery that are married to rich men - sort of a trophy wife.
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Our secret desire as women is to have a guy who falls madly in love with us even though we're incredibly opinionated or we're not the sort of normal, polite, poised woman.
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I always remember this neighbor who would ask me to babysit for her. She looked like Jayne Mansfield, and I remember babysitting for, like, five hours and she would pay me 80 cents, with a phony smile. I used to go home fuming to my mum.
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I wasn't very good in my serious acting class. Sometimes people took our class so seriously, so I used to, sort of, make fun of people after class. And so a friend of mine said, 'Why don't you do the comedy thing.' That's how it all worked out.
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All the guys that entered The Groundlings, like Will Ferrell, already had incredible confidence, but I watched shut down women that didn't even have a personality completely become different human beings because of the training.
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If I wasn't an actress and I wasn't Stifler's mom, my life would be so dull.
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When I walk into a video arcade filled with 16- or 17-year-old boys, I may as well be Marilyn Monroe.
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Usually, when you're an actress, you have to audition 20 times.
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When people slave over those scripts and pay hundreds of thousands of dollars for them, they don't usually want you to add farts.
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The best thing about animated-feature people is that they are very laid-back people. You feel like you're showing up for a backyard barbecue.
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I always feel in movies, I don't know if it's because I'm jaded, but I always feel like we don't go far enough.
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A man's ability to haggle is never a turn-on. The only thing less romantic than how much you paid is how much you saved. The last thing we want to hear is how you talked the jeweler down on our new earrings.
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Physically, no one would ever consider me for the serial-killer lady.
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I'm kind of harsher than most people.