Jessi Klein Quotes
The very first time I did standup, I went to an open mike on the Lower East Side at a place that doesn't exist anymore. And it was one of those open mikes that wasn't really just for comedy.
Quotes to Explore
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I wish the world could better know this country for what it really is. Not just a greedy economic giant crouching fearfully behind its walls, not just a panoplied warrior nervously fingering his weapons. What is this, is a people who gather together in thousands to give a people's government its essential vitality.
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At one point, I had a story accepted at the 'New Yorker,' which sent off weird bells in people when I told them - 'Oh,' they thought, 'now you are a writer' - where I really had been for the last 30-odd years.
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Politics and power is a realm of relative influence.
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I don't know how you make decisions in your life, but I weigh lots of things, and it's not always the purest of things for why I take a job or do this. I always try to think of the many different factors in my life, and not one is pure greed. One is pure quality of life.
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Anyone can go out on stage and start beating people over the head with rubber chickens. That'll get people's attention.
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The Constitution acknowledges two kinds of taxes: direct and indirect... Examples of direct taxes are income and property taxes... Examples of indirect taxes are import and excise taxes.
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Cartooning was a good fit for me. And yet now, years later, I almost never think about it.
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Waiting for me in Stockholm will be a personal assistant - Katrina from the Ministry for Foreign Affairs - as well the secretary of the Swedish Academy. They'll help us with our things and take us to our hotel. From the moment I arrive, I'll always be together with the other two laureates.
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I first started writing fiction in college because I was attracted to beautiful sentences. I loved to read them. I wanted to write them.
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I think that T.V. shows are more like working at a home. You know you're going to the same place every day, working with the same people, the same cast and crew. You're in a dressing room instead of a trailer, so I think that that's more of a normal sort of lifestyle.
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It's such a weird self-confidence that an artist has - to conceive of this thing that serves no function and say, 'I'm going to really work hard for it and give it and it's just going to matter to people.' You really have to believe it all on your own.
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When I was little, we had a Golden Book that had all these Disney characters in one portrait on the first page. My dad used to read from it every night. We'd play this game of find Pluto or find Donald Duck. He'd read us stories and do all the voices. Those are great memories.
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I'm under five feet; I'm very small, 4'11 1/2.
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I think it's possible to be multi-rooted, rather like a banyan tree, without being deracinated.
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People make mistakes. They say stupid things.
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The best thing to do is just leave them alone. Alligators want to be away from you just as much as you want to be away from them.
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There is a very thin line between confidence and arrogance.
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Environmental concern is a phenomena that tends to rise in a nation after a certain level of wealth.
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Never put a sock in a toaster.
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I genuinely do think that skin does have a lot to do with genetics. I was blessed. You should see my mom and grandma - it's unfair!
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We're programmed to believe that time is the enemy, that it takes away from us or that it diminishes us. I have found that it's done the opposite to me. Life is in perfect balance. It's just that our perception of it isn't.
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My agent says that I'm a 'repeat business guy.' If you hire me to come do a movie, I'll be on time, know all my material, be ready to go, have a good attitude. I'm here to work, so I get hired over and over again by the same producers. If you just be a team player on set you can work so much more often.
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It's so important to spend your free time with little people. They grow up before you know it. Childhood is gone in the blink of an eye.
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The very first time I did standup, I went to an open mike on the Lower East Side at a place that doesn't exist anymore. And it was one of those open mikes that wasn't really just for comedy.
