Jim Gaffigan Quotes

But truly, women are amazing. Think about it this way: a woman can grow a baby inside her body. Then a woman can deliver the baby through her body. Then, by some miracle, a woman can feed a baby with her body. When you compare that to the male’s contribution to life, it’s kind of embarrassing, really.

Jim Gaffigan

• Thinking
• Women
• Funny
• Baby
• Miracle

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Quotes to Explore

• The Enlightenment view of mankind is a complete myth. It leads us into thinking we're sane and rational creatures most of the time, and we're not.

  

  J. G. Ballard
  • Time
  • Thinking
  • View

• As to women, the Islamic faith has given women rights that are equal to or more than the rights given them in the Old Testament and the Bible.

  

  Abdullah of Saudi Arabia
  • Women
  • Faith
  • Bible

• I want to encourage women to take control of their health.

  

  Laila Ali
  • Women
  • Control
  • Health

• We take so many of our freedoms for granted nowadays - I can travel where I like, I can have a baby when I like, I can do any job I want - but I do think chivalry has been lost a little bit.

  

  Dan Stevens
  • Job
  • Lost
  • Travel

• I think one challenge is that having few women in your work environment makes you feel a little isolated and alone. I'm an extrovert; I like talking to people, and I make friends easily, but if your personality is somewhat different, I think you would struggle to connect with people.

  

  Padmasree Warrior
  • People
  • Work
  • Different

• I didn't grow up thinking I'd be a decorator. Design is my greatest passion, and it naturally just pulled me down the path. Same with TV. Being famous or having a show was never the motivation. I got a call and was swept up by the challenge of that first small space redesign.

  

  Nate Berkus
  • Up
  • Thinking
  • Small

• We took a plant that was being closed by a big company thinking there was no good use for it, and we came in with a different perspective. We bought some used equipment, as simple as we could.

  

  Hamdi Ulukaya
  • Good
  • Different
  • Thinking

• In Finland we have equal political rights for women and men. We do not regard ourselves according to sex.

  

  Harri Holkeri
  • Men
  • Women
  • Political

• Feminism is a socialist, anti-family, political movement that encourages women to leave their husbands, kill their children, practice witchcraft, destroy capitalism and become lesbians.

  

  Pat Robertson
  • Women
  • Children
  • Family

• I don't believe in categorising a gender, as it makes for discord. People always say, 'That's what men are like' or, 'That's what women do'; I don't really feel that at all. I think that's because I have two fathers, three brothers, a husband and two sons. I'm surrounded by maleness, and I couldn't possibly summarise them into a type.

  

  Natascha McElhone
  • People
  • Believe
  • Men

• I pray to God I get inside a girl's head one day and see what in the WORLD they are thinking.

  

  AJ McLean
  • World
  • God
  • Thinking

• Once you're a chess player, you spend a lot of time thinking about the game and you can't get it completely out of your head.

  

  Magnus Carlsen
  • Time
  • Thinking
  • Game

• The fascination of shooting as a sport depends almost wholly on whether you are at the right or wrong end of the gun.

  

  P. G. Wodehouse
  • Funny
  • End
  • Gun

• Liberals have invented whole college majors - psychology, sociology and women's studies - to prove that nothing is anybody's fault.

  

  P. J. O'Rourke
  • Women
  • College
  • Psychology

• I think that it's hard for vain people to be funny. I think you can look any way you want as long as you have a good sense of humor about yourself. People who are concerned with their looks and what they're wearing and how they present themselves tend to have less of a sense of humor about themselves.

  

  Taran Killam
  • People
  • Good
  • Long

• I will revive the legend of the economic miracle, making the country a place where people have no worry about living and young people merrily go to work.

  

  Park Geun-hye
  • People
  • Work
  • Country

• In the Sixties, fashion was about liberation. It was about setting women free; it wasn't about being unable to walk.

  

  Veruschka von Lehndorff
  • Women
  • Free
  • Fashion

• It's true - women want the fantasy. So give them romance - but without the desperation, wondering, and waiting you see in the movies.

  

  Nadine Velazquez
  • Women
  • True
  • Want

• I like to play smart, three-dimensional women. I also like to play roles where the women are a little crazy. I just have a feel for crazy people.

  

  Lili Taylor
  • People
  • Women
  • Crazy

• Don't ever criticize yourself. Don't go around all day long thinking, 'I'm unattractive, I'm slow, I'm not as smart as my brother.' God wasn't having a bad day when he made you... If you don't love yourself in the right way, you can't love your neighbour. You can't be as good as you are supposed to be.

  

  Joel Osteen
  • Good
  • God
  • Thinking

• On marriage to Jonny Lee Miller: It comes down to timing. I think he's the greatest husband a girl could ask for. I'll always love him, we were simply too young.

  

  Angelina Jolie
  • Thinking
  • Girl
  • Marriage

• I try to write as serious as possible, and then a joke slips in.

  

  Jeff Lindsay
  • Serious

• The suicide bomber's imagination leads him to believe in a brilliant act of heroism, when in fact he is simply blowing himself up pointlessly and taking other people's lives.

  

  Salman Rushdie
  • People
  • Up
  • Believe

• But truly, women are amazing. Think about it this way: a woman can grow a baby inside her body. Then a woman can deliver the baby through her body. Then, by some miracle, a woman can feed a baby with her body. When you compare that to the male’s contribution to life, it’s kind of embarrassing, really.

  

  Jim Gaffigan
  • Thinking
  • Women
  • Funny