Jim Gaffigan Quotes

Wouldn't it have been weird to go to high school with the Pope? You know, somebody did, someone's sitting at home, watching TV in Poland, they see the Pope, they think, "That guy was a jerk! He was so mean to me and now he's Pope? I got a swirly from the Pope!"

Jim Gaffigan

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Quotes to Explore

• I get up, go and get a coffee, and go do the crossword - I'm loyal to one particular paper, the 'Guardian' - and that's my idea of a perfect morning.

  

  Laura Marling
  • Up
  • Perfect
  • Morning

• I love being the mayor. I want to be the mayor forever.

  

  Ed Koch
  • Love
  • Want
  • Forever

• It was just such a demeaning thing to do, being in silent movies. They'd call you up and tell you, 'Hey, jump off this building!' and they'd give you a hundred bucks, and you'd do it.

  

  Parker Posey
  • Up
  • Movies
  • Building

• I tramped. When I was on the freight trains, I wasn't looking for work. I was looking to go from place to place without paying any money.

  

  Utah Phillips
  • Work
  • Money
  • Looking

• Self-doubt kills talent.

  

  Edie McClurg
  • Doubt
  • Talent
  • Self-Doubt

• Mind is everything. Muscle - pieces of rubber. All that I am, I am because of my mind.

  

  Paavo Nurmi
  • Mind
  • Being
  • Muscle

• You just remember back when you were watching as a kid and going, 'Man, Sting's so cool,' and now I'm wrestling the guy. It's breathtaking.

  

  A.J. Styles
  • Remember
  • Guy
  • Man

• The bad reviews get to me, believe me.

  

  Daniel Craig
  • Believe
  • Bad
  • Me

• I have had an experience which might perhaps be described as being shot down. At the same time, I call shot down only when one falls down. Today I got into trouble but I escaped with a whole skin.

  

  Manfred von Richthofen
  • Time
  • Experience
  • Today

• I started classes and it wasn't because I was like, 'I want to be an actor!' - I was really interested in the theory of what acting can be and what it's about. It's all about living in the moment and kind of being present, which is something that at that time in my life I really wanted to explore.

  

  Caity Lotz
  • Life
  • Time
  • Present

• Happiness is knowing and appreciating what you've got. I am very, very, very grateful for what, to me, is dead easy.

  

  Maeve Binchy
  • Happiness
  • Knowing
  • Grateful

• My friend Jerry Falwell was the one who said it, and he was a guest on my show, and it's hard to take the blame for everybody who shows up on your show.

  

  Pat Robertson
  • Up
  • Friend
  • Said

• Bears are very nice, as long as you are nice to them.

  

  Karl Lagerfeld
  • Long
  • You
  • Nice

• The beautiful thing about the NFL season is to see a team come together after they get to know each other in the spring and summer. You then go through adversity together and see how you respond. The teams that can respond in a positive way are the teams that are going to be there in the end.

  

  Aaron Rodgers
  • Together
  • Beautiful
  • Team

• A bicycle has transformed my experience of London.

  

  Iain Glen
  • Experience
  • London
  • Bicycle

• I know the pressures of being the daughter of a great actress. But it's inspiring. You learn so much that other people don't get to learn until later on. My father being a director, I learnt a real work ethic.

  

  Natasha Richardson
  • People
  • Work
  • Great

• To people who traditionally charge $10,000 for a 3D animating app, we say you should be free-to-play and generate a revenue stream. Think of a 3D modeling package almost like an RPG.

  

  Gabe Newell
  • People
  • Think
  • Free

• I don't think I've ever been chatted up, and I don't think I've ever chatted anyone up. The Fresh Prince has the best chat-up lines.

  

  Laura Mvula
  • Up
  • Think
  • Best

• A soccer game is a Wagner opera. The narrative sets up, the tension builds, the music ebbs and flows, the strings, the horns, more tension, and suddenly a moment of pure bliss, trumpet-tongued Gabriel sings, and gods descend from Olympus to dance - this peak of ecstasy.

  

  Rabih Alameddine
  • Up
  • Music
  • Game

• Privacy under what circumstance? Privacy at home under what circumstances? You have more privacy if everyone's illiterate, but you wouldn't really call that privacy. That's ignorance.

  

  Bruce Sterling
  • Home
  • Ignorance

• If you see me or another model in a bar, wait until you are spoken to before you speak.

  

  Jessica Hart
  • Model

• We (actors) don't really change the world. We reflect it... but Washington really changes the world.

  

  Martin Sheen
  • World

• Wouldn't it have been weird to go to high school with the Pope? You know, somebody did, someone's sitting at home, watching TV in Poland, they see the Pope, they think, "That guy was a jerk! He was so mean to me and now he's Pope? I got a swirly from the Pope!"

  

  Jim Gaffigan
  • School
  • Home
  • Funny