Jim Gaffigan Quotes

I'm an eccentric, silly, observational guy, but I'm not gonna frighten off social conservatives.

Jim Gaffigan

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• Silly

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Quotes to Explore

• What I felt was, if you spend your life just writing fiction, you are going to falsify your material. And the fictional form was going to force you to do things with the material, to dramatize it in a certain way. I thought nonfiction gave one a chance to explore the world, the other world, the world that one didn't know fully.

  

  V. S. Naipaul
  • Life
  • World
  • Writing

• Let's talk about Connie Britton, who I love. I don't know of a person who doesn't love her, I don't know a man or woman who doesn't have a crush on her, she's the most fabulous person in the entire world, and she's such an incredible actress, and so sweet, and I love her.

  

  Maggie Carey
  • World
  • Know
  • Person

• I don't think healthcare's a right. The only right you have is the ability to go out on an even playing field and work, and then purchase health insurance, or whatever it is.

  

  Adam Carolla
  • Work
  • Health
  • Insurance

• What is sure is that the satellite view of our world and its evolution is now a common reality.

  

  Olivier Theyskens
  • World
  • Reality
  • Evolution

• I love cooking and baking.

  

  Rachel Bilson
  • Love
  • Cooking
  • Baking

• Science is not everything, but science is very beautiful.

  

  J. Robert Oppenheimer
  • Beautiful
  • Science
  • Very

• Being born in a duck yard does not matter, if only you are hatched from a swan's egg.

  

  Hans Christian Andersen
  • Matter
  • Egg
  • Duck

• Simplicity is prerequisite for reliability.

  

  Edsger Dijkstra
  • Simplicity
  • Reliability

• I live with myself. I wake up with myself, I eat, and I take a dump with myself. I don't see anything special there. I do all the same things other human beings and creatures do. I don't see any need to be telling the data of the day of this particular human being by posting it on online. It's not interesting to me.

  

  Damien Rice
  • Up
  • Live
  • Interesting

• The game of basketball is one thing, but the image of the game is another thing.

  

  Earl Monroe
  • Game
  • Basketball
  • Image

• I have been in more classrooms than any legislator will ever walk into in their lives, and I see wonderful, caring, dedicated teaching out there.

  

  Patricia Polacco
  • Will
  • Caring
  • Walk

• Some people rehearse to a point where they're robotic, and they sound like they have memorized their presentation and didn't take it to the next level. Going from sounding memorized and canned to sounding natural is a lot of work.

  

  Nancy Duarte
  • People
  • Work
  • Sound

• Let's create a legal system that can work.

  

  Sam Brownback
  • Work
  • System
  • Legal

• I didn't hang around films. I don't know if I'd ever seen Hitchcock's The Lady Vanishes.

  

  Patricia Highsmith
  • Know
  • Lady
  • Seen

• Each day more coalition MPs in seats outside the South East come out against George Osborne's regional pay cut plans, and Vince Cable now claims they are dead.

  

  Frances O'Grady
  • Day
  • Now
  • Outside

• My college friends call me Karu, which is the worst. Only in our country can we make a short form for a short name. But otherwise, I've never had a pet name all my life. But now, in official meetings, someone will call me KJo. And I'll judge that person in my head. Just call me Karan.

  

  Karan Johar
  • Life
  • Country
  • Friends

• My mom would always play me a lot of late-'50s, late-'60s rock.

  

  G-Eazy
  • Me
  • Play
  • Mom

• I feel like a lot of serious music lives in generalizations - 'Love is a flower,' 'The sky is so dark' - but comedy lives in specifics.

  

  Rachel Bloom
  • Music
  • Comedy
  • Serious

• My message on immigration is that the people who want to come to this country, by and large, even those who have done it illegally, are coming for the right reasons, not to take advantage of our welfare system.

  

  Blake Farenthold
  • People
  • Country
  • Done

• I am going to work with Tom Daschle. And I'll work with the Republican leaders and the president to try and come up with something that we can all be proud of.

  

  John Breaux
  • Up
  • Work
  • Proud

• Knowledge is power. Unfortunate dupes of this saying will keep on creating, ambitiously, till they have stunned their native initiative and made their thoughts weak.

  

  Clarence Day
  • Power
  • Knowledge
  • Thoughts

• And Alpo ordered guys to slaughter guys, and the whole Harlem was in tears when Rich Porter died.

  

  Cam'ron
  • Guy
  • Tears
  • Rich

• Now it all seems so simple. Events intersect free of any logic of sequence; they cover space and time in an even, translucent layer. Memory re-creates them from the back, from the front, or sideways, but to them it makes no difference.

  

  Andrzej Stasiuk
  • Memory
  • Events
  • Sequence

• I'm an eccentric, silly, observational guy, but I'm not gonna frighten off social conservatives.

  

  Jim Gaffigan
  • Guy
  • Silly