Jim Gaffigan Quotes

Oh great, socks. You know I'm dying for your sins right? Yeah, but thanks for the socks! They'll go great with my sandals. What am I, German?

Jim Gaffigan

• Dying
• Christmas
• Sin
• Thanks

• Previous
• Next

Quotes to Explore

• It's hard to find an emblem of cultural, national pride that burns as bright as Israel's success in classical music.

  

  Zubin Mehta
  • Music
  • Success
  • Pride

• You know, my family stood for something that they believed in, and I wasn't about to turn my back on them.

  

  Rafael Palmeiro
  • Family
  • You
  • Know

• So many boys and girls talk the same way, listen to the same music, look the same. If I'm out, I'll notice the person who looks different before I notice the person who's, 'really hot.'

  

  Jack Antonoff Fun.
  • Music
  • Different
  • Look

• Second place is just the first place loser.

  

  Dale Earnhardt
  • Place
  • Loser
  • Second Place

• It may be a cold, clammy thing to say, but those that treat friendship the same as any other selfishness seem to get the most out of it.

  

  E. W. Howe
  • May
  • Cold
  • Friendship

• My mom and stepdad were strict. I couldn't date; I couldn't go out. And I was a kid who was never good at just taking no for an answer. I needed to understand why. And sometimes they weren't interested in explaining.

  

  Mahershala Ali
  • Good
  • Why
  • Mom

• As for swimming, I'm now in the pool 5 days a week from 8 to 10 a.m. And I'm in the gym for an hour and a half, 4 days a week. Two days upper body, two days lower.

  

  Dana Torres
  • Body
  • Week
  • Gym

• Whereas, generally speaking, zinc reacts suitably only with the first members of the alkyl iodides, with magnesium it is possible to use bromides, iodides, and in many cases, chlorides.

  

  Victor Grignard
  • First
  • Possible
  • Speaking

• I'm happy to say that I'm a lesbian in the world. I know there are people who don't want to be called women comedians, but I think it gives a path to the fact that we live in extremely patriarchal times.

  

  Kate Clinton
  • People
  • World
  • Live

• I'll tell you what's helped me my entire life. I look at baseball as a game. It's something where people can go out, enjoy and have fun. Nothing more.

  

  Harry Caray
  • People
  • Life
  • Fun

• My parents told me either I choose badminton, or school has to make the best of me.

  

  Taufik Hidayat
  • School
  • Parents
  • Me

• I had my first concert in front of 80,000 people at the International Soca Monarch Finals.

  

  Rachel Platten
  • People
  • First
  • Concert

• The only time I can't sleep is on a plane, when I am literally keeping it in the air with my brain.

  

  Natalie Massenet
  • Time
  • Sleep
  • Brain

• Scotland's political identity was destroyed, and a huge Scottish emigration to North America followed the brutal Highland clearances. These included every layer of Scottish society, not just the remnants of the defeated clans.

  

  Tariq Ali
  • America
  • Society
  • Political

• In the time I spent with him, Jurgen Klopp was enigmatic, larger than life, and extremely quick-witted. He is quite unique as a football manager in many ways, and that is what makes him so entertaining.

  

  Gary Lineker
  • Life
  • Time
  • Football

• The intensity of being in front of all these incredible musicians and tremendous conductors in these elaborate halls can be overwhelming.

  

  Idina Menzel
  • Being
  • Musicians
  • Intensity

• I used to lie between cool, clean sheets at night after I'd had a bath, after I had washed my hair and scrubbed my knuckles and finger-nails and teeth. Then I could lie quite still in the dark with my face to the window with the trees in it, and talk to God.

  

  Frances Farmer
  • God
  • Night
  • Cool

• Ordinary riches can be stolen; real riches cannot. In your soul are infinitely precious things that cannot be taken from you.

  

  Oscar Wilde
  • Soul
  • Riches
  • Precious

• Our focus is on electing Hillary Clinton, Tim Kaine and Democrats across the country, thanks to Democratic Party that is strong, unified, and poised for victory in November.

  

  Donna Brazile
  • Country
  • Strong
  • Party

• The late Seventies was the death of the manufacturing age in the United States. It was also a time when the Pictures Generation artists were getting started. They co-opted the language of advertising. The factory disappeared, and weirdly, so did the art object - it was the age of making gestures, not objects.

  

  Rachel Kushner
  • Time
  • Art
  • Age

• I have finished second twice in my time at Green Bay, and I don't ever want to finish second again. There is a second place bowl game, but it is a game for losers played by losers. It is and always has been an American zeal to be first in anything we do, and to win, and to win, and to win.

  

  Vince Lombardi
  • Time
  • American
  • Game

• The only problem is I can't get into PG-13 Land. I just get stuck in R rated movies, which they would love us to make PG-13 movies but I never get there. But I think that you've got to make them different. You've got to switch them up.

  

  Joel Silver
  • Up
  • Different

• I have never seen so many celebrities and their pets in one place, giving such support to the cause of protecting animal rights. Protecting their rights should always be our first priority.

  

  Linda Blair
  • Giving
  • Support
  • Animal

• Oh great, socks. You know I'm dying for your sins right? Yeah, but thanks for the socks! They'll go great with my sandals. What am I, German?

  

  Jim Gaffigan
  • Dying
  • Christmas
  • Sin