Jim Gaffigan Quotes
You never want to be the worst bowler of the group-because then everyone treats you like you have cancer. "You can do it! We're praying for you." The advice starts. "Use a heavier ball." "Keep your arm straight." "You should get a vasectomy." If you're really bad at bowling like me, they'll ask if want the bumpers up. Not that bowling is that complex anyway. "You want the bumpers? We can get rid of the pins. Why don't you take this coloring book and sit in the corner?"

Quotes to Explore
-
Every writer I know got their start in a library somewhere. We read a book, and we thought, 'I want to do that.'
-
I realized what interested me as a student of film was one thing and the movies that I liked were another.
-
Teaching children about entrepreneurship is much like imparting any other skill or piece of knowledge. You will provide them with ways to experience how entrepreneurship works, and you guide them toward the subjects or areas they seem to show an interest in.
-
One of the things jazz has always excelled at is translating the reality of the times through its musical prism.
-
I would love to have some sort of 'Back To The Future' Delorean time machine travel device so I could go back to 1981 to see that very first Jackson 5 concert I went to, back when I was a kid.
-
If I only had a little humility, I'd be perfect.
-
I like to have something to base a role on.
-
I didn't know what it was not to work hard as I grew up.
-
We're raising a generation of kids who are being overly praised for incredibly minor accomplishments. I think it's counter-productive.
-
As long as I have a heartbeat, I'm fine. So I just do what I love, and I do it the best that I can. And if it all goes away, I'll just start over.
-
Starting that union was something I believed in very strongly.
-
To be a more efficient, faster, and cheaper way to send money around the world, you have to be able to get in and out of Bitcoin. You need to have a liquid exchange on either end of the corridor.
-
If I'm on holiday, I'm active on the beach, I play tennis, I run, I swim a lot. It's just about making the workouts fun, I think, and then it doesn't really feel that bad.
-
My hobbies include maintaining my physical and mental health. It's a full-time job. Yoga definitely helps for both of them. I'm a big fan of relaxing and not having a schedule. That's my best way to keep from going crazy.
-
Useful as a war against France, undertaken by the Government against the will of the people would be for our revolutionary development, just so dangerous must be the effect upon our democratic development of a war supported by blind popular enthusiasm.
-
I've got a full plate, yes I do. That iPod, that's nice. A phone recorder? Nicely done. All right I'm a bit of a tech geek. I have a subscription to Popular Science and I keep up on all this stuff.
-
To me, success in the job is setting a vision, guiding an organization through change - which is exactly what I did at Digitas, and I'm very proud of that - and bringing people together and with you. That, to me, is what it takes to be successful.
-
Nothing in man is more serious than his sense of humor; it is the sign that he wants all the truth.
-
Enthusiasm is something so positive.
-
I told the Commonwealth Commissioners I lived in the virtue of that life and power that took away the occasion of all wars... I told them I was come into the covenant of peace which was before wars and strife were.
-
The user of the electric light - or a hammer, or a language, or a book - is the content. As such, there is a total metamorphosis of the user by the interface. It is the metamorphosis that I consider the message.
-
I've worked hard all my life. You have to if you want to get things done.
-
You never want to be the worst bowler of the group-because then everyone treats you like you have cancer. "You can do it! We're praying for you." The advice starts. "Use a heavier ball." "Keep your arm straight." "You should get a vasectomy." If you're really bad at bowling like me, they'll ask if want the bumpers up. Not that bowling is that complex anyway. "You want the bumpers? We can get rid of the pins. Why don't you take this coloring book and sit in the corner?"