Jim Gaffigan Quotes
Quotes to Explore
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Success to me is having ten honeydew melons and eating only the top half of each slice.
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Happiness radiates like the fragrance from a flower and draws all good things towards you.
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I was a very focused kid. I always had this crazy lifestyle... billions of jobs, two hours of gymnastics every day, handball, anything with a ball, really. I must have had ADHD or something. I was very energetic, and very small. I didn't start growing until the last year of high school.
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I've always found that no matter how much you spend on a movie - you can spend sixty dollars or sixty million dollars - if the movie's good, it's good.
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When I was doing all this acting stuff, all these kids, like, assumed, 'Oh, my God, you're on TV, and you probably have a lot of money.' And I was living in a garage.
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If you're a writer, write. You just keep writing. And if you're a filmmaker, you keep doing what you can to keep telling your stories; you don't stay on the one. Keep moving forward and doing what you can to tell whatever story you can tell, be it via writing, be it via filming it.
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Some people feel that what we're doing makes no sense, that it's just a waste of money. But it's working.
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I've had my run in with trouble. Fortunately, you know, one slap on the hand is usually the last time for me... I learned my lesson.
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My secret to all casting, and specifically kids, is cast good human beings.
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I know the power obedience has of making things easy which seem impossible.
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My daughter passed away in 2003.
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Achievement results from work realizing ambition.
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Life rarely presents fully finished photographs. An image evolves, often from a single strand of visual interest - a distant horizon, a moment of light, a held expression.
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The two most frightening words in Washington are 'bipartisan consensus.' Bipartisan consensus is when my doctor and my lawyer agree with my wife that I need help.
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I've written a screenplay that is a series of monologues and songs; they form this sort of human tapestry across time and place. The form is strange, but I find it really fascinating.
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The Unites States used to use law enforcement to aggressively target North Korea illicit activities - counterfeiting U.S. currency, drug-running, counterfeit cigarettes and pharmaceuticals - until diplomacy gutted those efforts. The effort should be reinvigorated.
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Women are capable of doing so many things these days, physically, emotionally, within relationships and career. There are so many things that women have evolved into and I feel really proud about where women are right now.
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The live setting is always better for me. I usually thrive at live. I feel like having a band behind me and being able to interact with the crowd helps boost my energy up.
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You've got to think lucky. If you fall into a mudhole, check your back pocket - you might have caught a fish.
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Confidence has nothing to do with what you look like. If you obsess over that, you'll end up being disappointed in yourself all the time. Instead, high self-esteem comes from how you feel in any moment. So walk into a room acting like you're in charge, and spend your energy on making the people around you happy.
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I don't think you can reach the same highs working in a band as you can on your own.
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I make big objects that are simple, bright and clear, kind of ironic but hopefully funny because I love the shapes, and I get inspiration from toys and books, and I believe in art for everyone.
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I think I'm one of those guys who was sort of always in comedy. I thought of myself - and other people seemed to think of me - as funny from a very young age. I was a very young comedy nerd and I even did sketch comedy in high school and college. I wrote and shot sketches on video and acted in them.
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My new years resolution? I will be less laz.
