Joe R. Lansdale Quotes

If you don't toot your own horn, it goeth untooted.

Joe R. Lansdale

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Quotes to Explore

• When you're babysitting a kid, all you're seeing is a version of them, a small dosage.

  

  J. B. Smoove
  • You
  • Small
  • Seeing

• For us, overseas employment addresses two major problems: unemployment and the balance of payments position.

  

  Ferdinand Marcos
  • Balance
  • Problems

• Mark Wahlberg, when I was in high school, people were like, 'You look like Marky Mark!' Then as I got older, they were like, 'You look like Donnie Wahlberg.' Now they're like, 'You look like Donnie Wahlberg's cousin from Massachusetts.'

  

  Ike Barinholtz
  • People
  • School
  • High

• Your ability to shape your future depends on how well you communicate where you want to be when you get there. When ideas are communicated effectively, people follow and change.

  

  Nancy Duarte
  • People
  • Future
  • Change

• If a strong government finds that it can, with impunity, destroy a weak people, then the hour has struck for that weak people to appeal to the League of Nations to give its judgment in all freedom. God and history will remember your judgment.

  

  Haile Selassie
  • People
  • God
  • Remember

• I really, really enjoy comedy. I think that's one of my strong suits. It's my zone. And people don't expect it from me, which is a whammy.

  

  Bar Paly
  • People
  • Strong
  • Me

• I'm an Irish Catholic and I have a long iceberg of guilt.

  

  Edna O'Brien
  • Long
  • Catholic
  • Irish

• When you're younger, you worry about so many things that you don't need to worry about, like image, appearance.

  

  Zoe Sugg
  • You
  • Worry
  • Appearance

• I just have an inability to lie.

  

  Paloma Faith
  • Just
  • Lie
  • Inability

• This is very intriguing to think we should audit the Fed, but I discovered that probably if they audited the Fed, it would get a clean bill because it's undoubtedly doing exactly what it's supposed to do according to the law.

  

  G. Edward Griffin
  • Think
  • Law
  • Doing

• Their crew for 'Arrow' is just one of the most wonderful crews that I've worked with. I know that actors say that all the time, and it sounds like trash coming out of my own mouth, but it's so true.

  

  J. August Richards
  • Time
  • True
  • Know

• I think I'm like wine. The older I get, the better I get.

  

  Zlatan Ibrahimovic
  • Think
  • Better
  • Wine

• On TV, if you fluff your lines, nobody gives a toss. But if you fluff a penalty in the World Cup, well - we all know how much that matters.

  

  Gary Lineker
  • World
  • Know
  • Nobody

• I know my music is going well when I don't have insomnia.

  

  Carly Rae Jepsen
  • Music
  • Know
  • Insomnia

• I have a tendency to lean towards a more retro look.

  

  Haley Bennett
  • Look
  • More
  • Retro

• The reality is that there are so few roles out there for women and for women of color, and I'm a character actor, this I know. And I'm getting to see more of the roles that are out there, but there aren't many. And zilch have been studio movies. Zilch.

  

  Octavia Spencer
  • Women
  • Character
  • Reality

• make drawings of series of instruments and players; their shapes, twisting of the hands, arms and neck of the violinist; for example, puffing out and hollowing of the cheeks of bassoonists, oboists, etc..

  

  Edgar Degas

• Don't you think this outlaw bit has done got out of hand?What started out to be a joke, the law don't understand.Was it singing through my nose that got me busted by the man?Maybe this here outlaw bit has done got out of hand.

  

  Waylon Jennings
  • Done
  • Law
  • Hand

• For $60, I once bought a neck massage at a 'massage parlor' that advertised in 'The Washington Post.'

  

  Gene Weingarten

• Now the myths represent the Gods themselves and the goodness of the Gods subject always to the distinction of the speakable and the unspeakable, the revealed and the unrevealed, that which is clear and that which is hidden: since, just as the Gods have made the goods of sense common to all, but those of intellect only to the wise, so the myths state the existence of Gods to all, but who and what they are only to those who can understand.

  

  Sallust
  • Gods
  • Intellect
  • Distinction

• Death is at any time blessed but it is twice blessed for a warrior who dies for his cause, that is, truth.

  

  Mahatma Gandhi
  • Death
  • Blessed
  • Warrior

• America demands invention and innovation to succeed.

  

  Kit Bond
  • America
  • Innovation

• In no sense other than an utterly trivial one is reproduction the inverse of chemical disintegration. It is a misunderstanding of genetics to suppose that reproduction is only 'intended' to make facsimiles, for parasexual processes of genetical exchange are to be found in the simplest living things.

  

  Peter Medawar

• If you don't toot your own horn, it goeth untooted.

  

  Joe R. Lansdale