Joe R. Lansdale Quotes

If you don't toot your own horn, it goeth untooted.

Joe R. Lansdale

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Quotes to Explore

• When you're babysitting a kid, all you're seeing is a version of them, a small dosage.

  

  J. B. Smoove
  • You
  • Small
  • Seeing

• For us, overseas employment addresses two major problems: unemployment and the balance of payments position.

  

  Ferdinand Marcos
  • Balance
  • Problems

• Mark Wahlberg, when I was in high school, people were like, 'You look like Marky Mark!' Then as I got older, they were like, 'You look like Donnie Wahlberg.' Now they're like, 'You look like Donnie Wahlberg's cousin from Massachusetts.'

  

  Ike Barinholtz
  • People
  • School
  • High

• Your ability to shape your future depends on how well you communicate where you want to be when you get there. When ideas are communicated effectively, people follow and change.

  

  Nancy Duarte
  • People
  • Future
  • Change

• If a strong government finds that it can, with impunity, destroy a weak people, then the hour has struck for that weak people to appeal to the League of Nations to give its judgment in all freedom. God and history will remember your judgment.

  

  Haile Selassie
  • People
  • God
  • Remember

• I really, really enjoy comedy. I think that's one of my strong suits. It's my zone. And people don't expect it from me, which is a whammy.

  

  Bar Paly
  • People
  • Strong
  • Me

• I'm an Irish Catholic and I have a long iceberg of guilt.

  

  Edna O'Brien
  • Long
  • Catholic
  • Irish

• When you're younger, you worry about so many things that you don't need to worry about, like image, appearance.

  

  Zoe Sugg
  • You
  • Worry
  • Appearance

• I just have an inability to lie.

  

  Paloma Faith
  • Just
  • Lie
  • Inability

• This is very intriguing to think we should audit the Fed, but I discovered that probably if they audited the Fed, it would get a clean bill because it's undoubtedly doing exactly what it's supposed to do according to the law.

  

  G. Edward Griffin
  • Think
  • Law
  • Doing

• Their crew for 'Arrow' is just one of the most wonderful crews that I've worked with. I know that actors say that all the time, and it sounds like trash coming out of my own mouth, but it's so true.

  

  J. August Richards
  • Time
  • True
  • Know

• I think I'm like wine. The older I get, the better I get.

  

  Zlatan Ibrahimovic
  • Think
  • Better
  • Wine

• On TV, if you fluff your lines, nobody gives a toss. But if you fluff a penalty in the World Cup, well - we all know how much that matters.

  

  Gary Lineker
  • World
  • Know
  • Nobody

• I know my music is going well when I don't have insomnia.

  

  Carly Rae Jepsen
  • Music
  • Know
  • Insomnia

• I have a tendency to lean towards a more retro look.

  

  Haley Bennett
  • Look
  • More
  • Retro

• The reality is that there are so few roles out there for women and for women of color, and I'm a character actor, this I know. And I'm getting to see more of the roles that are out there, but there aren't many. And zilch have been studio movies. Zilch.

  

  Octavia Spencer
  • Women
  • Character
  • Reality

• make drawings of series of instruments and players; their shapes, twisting of the hands, arms and neck of the violinist; for example, puffing out and hollowing of the cheeks of bassoonists, oboists, etc..

  

  Edgar Degas

• Don't you think this outlaw bit has done got out of hand?What started out to be a joke, the law don't understand.Was it singing through my nose that got me busted by the man?Maybe this here outlaw bit has done got out of hand.

  

  Waylon Jennings
  • Done
  • Law
  • Hand

• Representative Chris Lee was forced to resign after sending a shirtless picture of himself to a woman on Craigslist. On the bright side, he DID surprise his wife for Valentines Day.

  

  Conan O'Brien
  • Wife
  • Picture
  • Valentine's Day

• I suppose I'd always been attracted to commitment-phobes because some part of me felt unlovable. It was a lot easier to fall for a guy who I knew, on some level, wouldn't fall in love with me. There was nothing to risk. The real risk would be to finally be vulnerable to love.

  

  Laura Fraser
  • Guy
  • Risk
  • Commitment

• I've enjoyed the opposite sex a lot. Always have. Always will.

  

  Betty White
  • Sex

• The American character looks always as if it had just had a rather bad haircut, which gives it, in our eyes at any rate, a greater humanity than the European, which even among its beggars has an all too professional air.

  

  Mary McCarthy
  • Character
  • American
  • Bad

• As an academic I feel I should intellectualize and theoretically analyze when all I really want to do is let the work take me somewhere, manipulate me, and then rough me up a bit. When it comes right down to it, I only want to spend time with work that makes me think and teaches me something while making my body react.

  

  Barbara DeGenevieve
  • Work
  • Teaches
  • Manipulate

• If you don't toot your own horn, it goeth untooted.

  

  Joe R. Lansdale